469. Why You Need Grit to Go From Great to Extraordinary

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Lesley Logan interviews Chris Janssen, life coach and author of Grace Yourself: How to Show Up for the Sober Life You Want. Chris shares her inspiring journey of overcoming perfectionism and addiction to create a fulfilling, purpose-driven life. Learn practical tools to build resilience, reframe self-sabotage, and unlock your potential for extraordinary growth.


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In this episode you will learn about:

  • Chris’ writing journey and the importance of vulnerability in storytelling.
  • How perfectionism shaped her struggles with addiction and personal growth.
  • Identifying and breaking unhealthy self-imposed rules for success.
  • Reframing obstacles by tweaking tactics, not giving up on desired outcomes.
  • Differentiating healthy guilt from harmful shame in overcoming setbacks.
  • Lessons from relapse and strategies to rebuild commitment.


Episode References/Links:


Guest Bio:

Chris Janssen, MA, BCC, is a leading results coach in performance and mindset and bestselling, award-winning author of "Living All In: How to Show Up for the Life You Want." She has worked with hundreds of sought-after professional athletes, singers, dancers, Hollywood writers, artists, authors, soldiers, entrepreneurs, and small businesses internationally to close the gap between where they are and where they want to be. In addition to her academic degrees, Chris was trained by and worked with Tony Robbins on his team of results coaches, the #1 personal development and peak performance strategy company in the world. As a board-certified coach, Chris excels in helping high-achieving perfectionists navigate performance pressure, overcome self-sabotage, re-write narratives, & attach meaning to life events & circumstances beyond our control, through utilizing her successful and sustainable Living All In methods. With a master’s in counseling psychology and 25+ years’ experience, Chris is widely regarded by entrepreneurs and creatives. Her 2nd book, "Grace Yourself: How to Show Up for the Sober Life You Want" is available now for pre-order. By pre-ordering you'll immediately receive bonus content Chris created for you and is only making available between now and launch day on March 18, 2025! A California native, Chris lives with her husband since 1995, Scott. They are currently Caliradoans, spliing time between Los Angeles and Castle Pines, Colorado, where they love to ski, golf, be with their horses, and adventure outside. Together they raised three children, now thriving young adults.

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Episode Transcript:

Chris Janssen 0:00  

It is a lot easier to stay sober than to get sober. So I tried it again. I'm an achiever, so I kept thinking. I got this. I can do it. In the book I do share about the last time alcohol got the best of me. I mean, I was passed out and on the ground if my husband wasn't there, I don't know if I would. I mean, it just completely obliterated me.


Lesley Logan 0:24  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.


Lesley Logan 1:05  

All right, Be It babe. I'm super excited because today's guest, I got to meet in person. You know those moments where you kind of make eye contact with someone, and then later on, you end up in the exact same room as them, and you're like, hey, I already met you, right? So it's kind of like those romcom movies, where they pass each other on the train or whatever, and then they're like in the meeting, right? So Chris Janssen is our guest today. She is the author of the newest, most amazing book called Grace yourself. And I'm just really excited to have this conversation with you, Chris, but I also am so glad we got to meet, we got to have dinner together, like we just kept hanging out all weekend long in Nashville. So Chris, tell everyone who you are and what you rock at. 


Chris Janssen 1:45  

Oh, I'm so happy I met you, I'm so happy I know you, so happy to be on the show. Yeah, I am a life coach, and I have been loving writing books. This is my second book. So really, what I do is I help high-achieving perfectionists navigate performance pressure, overcome self-sabotage, rewrite narratives, that's a big part of what I do, and attach meaning to life events and circumstances, usually those circumstances outside of our control, right? So that's really my niche, and what I love doing, and what I'm very good at. And the books help people do that, and they're full of tools and exercises too, because we all know it's a good idea to do that, but then how do you do it? So I walk people through how to.


Lesley Logan 2:29  

Yeah. Okay, so first of all, I think every listener's ears perked up when you just basically said all the labels that they, this is them, high-achieving, high-performing perfectionism. And I think some of those times, we don't want people to know that about us, so we like to hide those labels as well. And I think we can talk more about that when we get into your book. You've now written two. Can we talk a little about the journey of writing? Because I think a lot of people have a story to share, and something I love about the way you write, I feel like I was sitting down with you the way you write. It's not just conversational. You are sharing your story, but also, I love how you are anticipating what your reader might even be thinking before they think it. So can we talk a little about the journey to write and writing your story specifically? Because that's hard to do. You're sharing things that like, I don't know, maybe people want to keep quiet about themselves. So Kim, how did you do that? How did you go, yeah, here's all the things that I did.


Chris Janssen 3:26  

Yeah, it's embarrassing. Part of it's my age. I'm 55 my kids are all in their 20s, and I, part of it is I don't care as much as I used to when I was in my 30s. Thank you for saying that. I hear that a lot, that my books, my writing, is very conversational. I've always loved writing since I was a little girl. I wanted to be a famous lyricist in Nashville like I wanted to write, but I have no musical talent whatsoever. I can't even clap on beat in church. So that didn't pan out.


Lesley Logan 3:59  

I understand that, too. I used to wait for people to clap and I go okay, let me get on their beat.


Chris Janssen 4:07  

Yeah, oh, I know my husband's like, holds my hands at church. Okay, now. Yeah. I actually, years and years ago, went to a few writing conferences, and I made a stab at writing fiction like fantasy. It was horrific. I was terrible. So I like reading books. But then after I became a coach, I thought, I want all this written down. I won't be here forever, so I'd love this written down, mostly for my kids. And I really, truly love my clients. I love them. So when I'm writing, I'm definitely writing to my clients, and that helps a lot any writer. I was just coaching a writer and saying, you know, this is more about who you're talking to than letting us know your story, and once you're doing that, you're able to be more vulnerable and share the parts of, for me, I could share the parts of myself that, yeah, I would think, theoretically, they'd be pretty embarrassing to share if I'm sharing them, because it's going to help somebody else come out of the dark and take the shame off their stuff. Definitely, I'm going to share it. And then, of course, when I was done writing, I thought, oh my gosh, what have I done? I don't want anyone to read it. But then that passed too, because it's important. It was put on my heart to write in this book, brace yourself, the subtitle's How to Show Up for the Sober Life You Want. And it's really mostly about overcoming self-sabotage and being a perfectionist in order to help people with that, I do share how I used to be addicted to alcohol, and I'm not anymore, and how being a high achiever, being a perfectionist played into those habits that were really bad for me. 


Lesley Logan 5:54  

When I was reading the first chapters of your book, guys, I got the sneak peek. First of all, I sat and read them at lunch. So again, that conversationality was, like, really easy for me to flow through and and read that. But why I think it's exciting to talk to you today is I actually think that you could almost insert alcohol and sobriety from any kind of addiction, because the way you talk about is going to spoil (inaudible) I think it's like chapter two, you're like, I had a spreadsheet and I would measure it and I wouldn't do it after five. I had to be after five o'clock, and I, or so on the weekends, I had all these rules. And I was like, I know too many women who do that with food, or they do that with shopping, or they do it with lots of different things. If I have all these rules and it's all under my control, then I can't be an addiction that's controlling me, and clearly that's the story we're telling ourselves.


Chris Janssen 6:46  

Exactly, yeah, and that's a big coaching tool of mine is helping people with the rules they have for getting what they want. The rules are messed up. By the rules we set for ourselves, this is all in the book, we make it impossibly difficult to succeed in getting what we want and tragically easy to fail at getting what we want, right? Let's say, just also pick an easy one. Let's say what I want is to be happy. Well, if the rule I set for myself for being happy is people have to like me, that is a rule that I can't control, because I can't control what people think. So it's outside of my control. So I'm setting myself up for failure. So that could be with alcohol, shopping, anything. Yeah and then, so if we ditch the rule and don't ditch the outcome, don't ditch what we want, stay true to that, then tweak the rule, then we have a shot at getting what we want.


Lesley Logan 7:44  

That okay, that's I love this because, you know, something that I see when I coach a lot of the people in our fitness business program, and even, like the people that I work with on their Pilates practice, they'll say, like, I'm going to get three clients, and it's okay. I love that as a goal, like a rule, but you actually have control of when people decide to sign up with you. You know what I mean. So I like the outcome that you want. We can have that, but I think we need to tweak the how, or the rule or the thing you're doing, because, like, you only have control truly about the actions you take. You don't have control of the people who like this is the time they actually decide in the timeline you wanted to sign up with you. That's what you're talking about, right?


Chris Janssen 8:23  

Exactly. So in that case, it would be, what is it that you really want? Tell me what you want more than the three clients, right? Because, why do you want three clients? What? How will you know when you have three clients? How will you know like when you have, oh, because I'll be happy. Okay, well, maybe let's talk about that. Define happy, then that's probably the bigger one. So the three clients, we're gonna tweak that and not make that a standard, but we're gonna stay true to the bigger one, the being happy, or whatever it is that we came up with. 


Lesley Logan 8:55  

Oh, my God you're even, you're so good, yes, because that is making us distill down, like, what are we really wanting and what do we have control over for that? Yes, okay, so you've been a life coach for a really long time. So you've been seeing people like, helping people figure out what they want in their life for a really long time. Can we talk about becoming a life coach and then the life coach, correct me if I'm wrong, like you were life coaching and still trying to control the drinking at the same time or was it you became a life coach after? Remind me of the timeline.


Chris Janssen 9:27  

Well, the timeline is I got sober in 2007 and was sober for 14 years from alcohol, and so I became a life coach at that time. I enjoyed, yeah, and I, by the way, got to raise my babies. They've never seen me struggle with this. Never seen me drunk. I mean, sobriety gave me such a beautiful life. So I was already a life coach. Then in 2020 we moved to a different state. I had never lived outside of California. We moved to a different state, just like people were in 2020, I was a brand new empty nester. Let's do something new. We moved part time. We were going to split time between these two places, and everything was going so great. I just thought, you know, maybe I'm not alcoholic, maybe I don't have a problem with this. I did drink to normal, lot of stuff that I've worked through now, a lot. I mean, it's hard being a mom of three kids and having three teenagers all at once, and having people in your life that are controlling, and you're so young you don't know how to set boundaries. You don't know, you know. So I'd worked through a lot of stuff in sobriety, and so I got to this place, I thought, why did I quit drinking again? I think I kind of went out on a high note, not a low note. I mean, I don't really love the word relapse. I just call it going out. But I had a drink again, and I decided to try it. And I say I went out on a high. It wasn't like I hit a low and relapse. And that happens a lot, and people don't talk about it enough that high achievers struggle with if it's not alcohol, it's something else. Right? So everything I learned about my life coaching was in sobriety. So I had worked out that perfectionism stuff.


Lesley Logan 11:10  

Yeah, which I mean, okay, that we can talk about that in a moment, because we'd all love to know I call myself a recovering perfectionist, because I feel like recovered would be the perfectionist in me, but okay, I actually think that is something I love about your story, and I thought would be so cool to talk about, because most people, they do go on a low, so they hit a rock bottom, and they have this rock bottom story. And not only is it embarrassing, it's often scary or life changing, like they could have lost it and you didn't have that you were actually, you did. 


Chris Janssen 11:50  

Well, that's the crazy thing Lesley is so I did have a rock bottom with alcohol. My life in every other area was not unmanageable, but it was about to be. This is back when I first got sober in 2007 but I was still holding it all together. Yes, running in the morning, doing all this. But I did hit a bottom where it was that was a about to crumble, and I think it was a spiritual thing. I just thought, I'm gonna find a support meeting. I didn't know anyone alcoholic. No one in my family, believe it or not, my family, my parents, their parents, all my ancestors. They did not drink alcohol. They were just from the south. Very religious. They were teetotalers. So I didn't know. I didn't know. I don't even know if it runs in my family.


Lesley Logan 12:35  

Yeah. Okay. Thank you for correcting me. And then in 2020 you tried it again, but how did you make the decision to quit again? Did you use? 


Chris Janssen 12:45  

I hit another bottom. Yeah, it is a lot easier to stay sober than to get sober. So I tried it again, and I tell this whole story in the book in a pretty concise way, but I'm an achiever, so I kept thinking, I got this, I can do it. That episode didn't work out though I wanted it to. We'll try it again. You know, I just kept giving it my all. Yeah, and I do share that's embarrassing in this, in the book, I do share about my last bottom, like, the last time alcohol got the best of me. I mean, I was passed out and on the ground. If my husband wasn't there, I don't know if I would. I mean, it just completely obliterated me. So I got sober again.


Lesley Logan 13:27  

Okay. I think it's true. I think it's probably easier to stay than to get especially for the achiever, perfectionist person, it's really hard not to beat up on yourself to have so much judgment of, how did I let that happen? And for the achievers, I interviewed someone who was like, you know, you can have these amazing strengths. Like, being an achiever is not a bad thing, and it gets a lot of stuff done. You like, take action. People don't like you because you get stuff done. But you can also have what he called the basement of that strength, which is, I can get stuff done. I can figure this out. I can try and make this happen. So I recognize that I understand that. I, in my own life, have seen how my achieverness and my perfectionist has gotten me into trouble because I'm like, I can figure this. I figure everything out. So it's just it's hard. Let's talk about the shame and judgment, though, because I think this is where you so beautifully wrote it in your book about what are those shame judgment spirals, and how do they not help us? 


Chris Janssen 14:22  

Yeah, well, I think there is some healthy guilt, so I put a guilt assessment in there. Like, sometimes we have some guilt, and we really do need to make a change, right? Like, I needed to stop drinking alcohol. I think guilt is I did something wrong, and shame is I'm a bad person. I don't believe that there's any room ever, I don't think shame ever holds any room in our, yeah, I think it's trash. 


Lesley Logan 14:48  

Yeah, I agree. I really. I mean, Brené Brown said it guilt versus shame, healthy guilt, I think is a good sign, because it's not. I am this. I did this. I feel bad about that, you know, versus I am stupid. No, I did a thing that wasn't very smart. That's the guilt versus shame, right? Like the label, yeah? 


Chris Janssen 15:07  

And for me, it was really, I had to really define. And this all just happened because I started drinking again, and that is when I really had to look at, really, how perfectionism was playing a role in all of this, and that is why I wrote this second book, because I had a lot of realizations because of that experience. One of them was that I needed to ask, what is the difference between a perfectionist and achiever? A high achiever will go after their goals and they will achieve them, right? A perfectionist will say, if I have to do this, and if I don't, I'm trash, and that's where the shape comes in. So I think perfectionism is I think there's adaptive and maladaptive perfectionism, right? There's harmful and help, not really helpful. But I would rather call it achiever and perfectionism. Yeah, I don't think being a high achiever is bad. I think being a perfectionist can really cause a lot of shame and cause problems.


Lesley Logan 16:07  

Yeah, yeah. I agree with you. There's this book. I don't remember the name guys, but I tried to read it about this one was trying to kind of almost say, like, it's okay to be a perfectionist. And I found myself getting mad at her, because it's (inaudible).


Chris Janssen 16:17  

Was it The Perfectionist Guide to Losing Control? 


Lesley Logan 16:22  

Yes and I didn't even get to the end. And maybe she gets better. First of all, I like the ideas of the different types of perfectionism. I thought that was actually very informative, that there can be messy perfectionist, but I just got real. I felt like she was trying to say it was okay to be perfectionist. And I was like, it's just not and maybe I didn't get to the end of her book to figure out, like, where her argument makes sense. But in my life, my perfection is what held me back. It's what kept me in a relationship that was not right for me. It's what made me push myself to unhealthy not sleeping over exercising like different things, where in I think it's okay, like, I don't mind the High Achiever label at all, because I do like to achieve things and make things happen, but when the perfectionist gets in there, I don't achieve things because I'm trying to over control it in a way that doesn't allow me to see the thing that I wanted to do in the first place. 


Chris Janssen 17:13  

That's right, yeah. And another name for high achiever is high growth. Sometimes I just say I'm high growth. We're always looking to grow. And (inaudible) high achiever. Yeah, I'm with you. Yeah. 


Lesley Logan 17:26  

I just love a reframe. I think, you know, a lot of words like selfishness, I think needs a rebrand, because I think so many people think they're being selfish when really it's self care. But I would love to hear from you like the be it till you see it, what were the steps that you are taking? And I know it's probably in your book that you got yourself to being sober again, and because, actually, I don't, I think it's and I'm sure you wish that you didn't go through your second bottom but I actually think it probably makes you a better person at coaching this and helping people through this, because you have done it, you actually know what's coming, and you can speak your story and probably save people from being curious about it again, but how, what were the things that you did to kind of help yourself get sober again? Because you had 14 years, so you had something you could kind of see to be. 


Chris Janssen 18:10  

Yeah, that's a good question, and I'm grateful for it because I wrote the book, and I had gotten very comfortable in my sobriety. I used the example in the book when your kid ties their shoe for the first time, you're like, oh my gosh, that's amazing. There's all this celebration, but when they tie it at 10 years old or 14 years old, it's not that big of a deal. So for me, sobriety had become like that, like I was 14 years sober, and I was just thinking it was just part of life, and I didn't. I forgot how magical and how special it is. So in order to get sober again, and this really is my answer to the be it question is focus on your commitments over your cravings. So it does take grit. We can't just visualize. And I think any recovery program has to be a program of action, and you have to be in community, so part of that grit is going to be sticking to your commitment. And then in the book, I have people write out exactly why you want, what you want. I wasn't clear on that the first time. I just kind of got sober because I think, well, gosh, I really need to, I have these babies. And then I realized it's such a wonderful life, but then I forgot why. So really know your why, but then more important is stick to your commitment, and when the cravings hit, you have a commitment, it's like we talked about your outcome. That's the part. You don't ditch the things to get your outcome, which I call strategy or tactics. Those you can tweak. You could tweak the tactics, right? If something's not working, just pick something else. If it's three isn't the person you want in your class, pick different number, but don't ditch the outcome. Because I see this. My clients are all high achievers. I see this time and time again, where a high achiever will ditch the outcome altogether. Here, because either it's not perfect or they're not getting the results they wanted. And so when you get to that area where you plateau, don't throw in the towel, don't go backwards, don't ditch the outcome. Keep muscling through it. That's where you need grit. It's like that two millimeter shift, right, from going from great to extraordinary. We're already high achievers. We're operating at 98%. What is keeping us from that final 2% shift, that two millimeter shift, that's where you have to not throw in the towel, tweak the tactics and stick to your commitments. 


Lesley Logan 20:35  

Yeah. That makes so much sense, and also isn't the simplest thing, the hardest thing to do?


Chris Janssen 20:43  

Yeah, that's why I say grit. 


Lesley Logan 20:45  

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I also think the commitment part is really cool. I think also I can see how, like, in the first time, it was easier to stay committed, because you had those babies, and life was really fun. And I can also totally see how you're like, you know, I'm an empty nester. I got a new place. I probably figured it out. I totally can see that. And then to have to figure out a new commitment to yourself, because it had to be a different one. It couldn't be for them anymore. It had to really be for you.


Chris Janssen 21:12  

That's exactly right. Yep, that's the key, right there. So my son, my youngest, is a rock climber, and something he shared with me, really helps me, because in rock climbing, the route they take to get to the top is called the problem. And they commit to getting to the top right, they have an end goal, and that problem, the route to get to the top has to change, like based on the weather or the rock or erosion or whatever, it can't be the same every time, or it can't always be the way they think it's going to be. So they have to alter their expectations. And that's a good visual for me. 


Lesley Logan 21:53  

I love that my husband and I wanted to take up rock climbing. I still think it could be a hobby for me, it's just that I just really wish there was a rock climbing gym just a little bit closer, because I wanted to be a little easier to go. But he and I, we have the same leg length and we're both flexible. So in theory, we could probably do the same problem. We go up the same route. I could follow him, or I could do what he did, because, you know, our leg length is the same. However, his years of experience rock climbing is different than mine. He's okay, like swinging a little bit by an arm and like grabbing onto something, he kind of understands how to launch himself, very different. Also just upper body strength, very different. So every time we do a route, really the same route, and we'll go totally different ways based on, like, how we can solve that problem and how we can get up there. I think that's such a cool if you haven't done rock climbing go. They have beginner ones, and they'll take you up. You don't do it on your own, but it's a great way to explore what you're saying. I love that. You wrote this book and you dedicated for you, the reader and for you, the writer, so it says for you and for me. Who are you hoping reads this book? 


Chris Janssen 23:04  

Yeah, a high-achieving perfectionist that wants to reach their goals and not deal with shame, and they're you've hit a pain threshold where enough is enough, and you're tired of self-sabotaging and beating up on yourself. And you know, we have all this kind of mental health information right now on social media and like everyone's telling us all kinds of things left and right. So how do you do it? Well, I just hold your hand and walk you through exactly how to do that. So that is my suggestion. You don't have to be alcoholic. You don't have to have an addiction, but, most likely you're going to be a high achiever who is tired of being hard on yourself. 


Lesley Logan 23:47  

Yeah, I think that's beautiful. I think even if it's not alcohol sobriety you're looking for, I do think if you are like, ladies, my high growth ladies, like, there's something magical about this, because you have the uncover section of the book. And then you have the recover, and then you have the rediscover, am I did I remember those correctly? 


Chris Janssen 24:06  

Just discover, yeah. So very good, yeah. Discovery, uncovery, recovery.


Lesley Logan 24:12  

Yes. So uncovery, yeah. I love these three sections because I think it's something we all have to kind of learn about ourselves. And you're right, like you open up your Instagram app, and every self-help person is telling you 17 things you have to do to get to the same, some people are like, ditch goals to feel better about yourself. Other people, like, you have to have a specific goal and has to be measurable and smart and all these things. And so the high growth or like, I gotta do, I'm gonna do. I'm gonna take this one, I'm gonna take this one, and it can be so it can be so much information. And you really do hold the reader's hand as you kind of go through this and uncover what is going on. And I really love your questions that you give, like, who, what rule did you give yourself? And like, how did that go? And so I think it's in the first part you guys, you get this amazing section to kind of go over that. And I think it's beautiful and brilliant. Now the book is done and you know it by the time you all hear this, it's gonna be out soon. What is your what is, what's the next thing that you're working towards? Is it like, I feel like, because you are a high growth person, are you just, oh yes, the book is done. Are you screwed? Like, what are we being till we see right now?


Chris Janssen 25:19  

I started writing a third book about relation, about relationships, yeah, and, but there's a lot to do still with this book I would love. Yeah, I created assets. I wrote a workbook, so I just finished that. Just finished edits on that the other day. I created a master class. I created a workshop where I walk people through this. So I created these things so that if people want to buy the bulk book in bulk for, you know, a group, and it doesn't have to be an addiction or recovery group, it could be a book club or, you know, like your audience, people that are high growth, and they, you know, two or more people that want to work through this. I created all these fun things that I am gifting people, if they do buy in bulk, preorder before launch day in March. 


Lesley Logan 26:14  

Okay, this is amazing because, you know, gone are the days you just read a book anymore, everyone, by the way. You have to do all these things.


Chris Janssen 26:20  

Oh my goodness.


Lesley Logan 26:22  

It's really true. You know, I guess I kind of wish I went into fiction writing. I wish I could just write fiction because you don't have to put assets with anything in fiction anymore. You write this beautiful thing and you like, I guess you hope it gets bought by Amazon. But you not only wrote this amazing book where you're so vulnerable and you give so much away. You put a workbook together, you put a course together all these things. I do think this is a book that is worth reading with your friends, even if none of you would call yourself an alcoholic or addicted to shopping or any of those labels. I think if you are high growth, it is a really good revealer and a good conversation, and like a great way to have deep conversations with our friends we probably wouldn't have without those prompts. 


Chris Janssen 27:04  

I agree. 


Lesley Logan 27:05  

Yeah. So then you got, Chris, you're amazing. You have a third book coming to some time. We'll have to talk about relationships next, when you're ready to do that, but we want to stick with this. I like to ask people what they're most excited about right now. So in this moment, what are you most excited about?


Chris Janssen 27:20  

So our youngest son got married a week ago. 


Lesley Logan 27:23  

Oh my God. 


Chris Janssen 27:24  

And my first kid to get married. So he is actually on his way. They got home from their honeymoon, and they're on their way to our house this hour. So that's, that's what I'm thinking about right now. Is him walking through the door, both of them. She's my new daughter. That's what I'm most excited about. But work wise, I'm super excited for the book launch. Really excited. I'm really excited for this book to be published for people, so that we could start talking about it with people that have already read it. I'm so excited. 


Lesley Logan 27:55  

Yeah, I'm excited for you. It's a needed book and a needed conversation, because I do love how you talked about and not everyone likes the word alcoholic, you know, like that label doesn't feel like awesome. And I do love the way you reframe and the way you have an open conversation about the possibilities, and also that you get to be sober, as opposed to you have to be so, like, there's just different ways that make things not just accessible, but kind, and no wonder you called it Grace Yourself. 


Chris Janssen 28:25  

Thank you. Yeah. 


Lesley Logan 28:26  

Well, we're gonna take a brief break, and then we're gonna find out where people can buy this book. Maybe get it in bulk, so they get all those fun things and your Be It Action Items. 


Lesley Logan 28:26  

All right, Chris, where can people go to buy the book? Where can they follow you? Where can they work with you?


Chris Janssen 28:38  

The main place, chrisjanssencoaching.com that's my website. I keep it updated with all those great bulk offers that I'm offering, making available between now and launch day, the upgrades, that will be at graceyourselfbook.com


Lesley Logan 28:54  

Okay, all right, graceyourselfbook.com (inaudible).


Chris Janssen 28:58  

Yes, I will have a link to that on my website, in case you forget. So chrisjanssencoaching.com. 


Lesley Logan 29:05  

Awesome, even if just the idea of reevaluating your outcomes and your goals so that you are keeping those commitments in mind, I think that's a wonderful reason to go work with you, Chris. I think so many of us place these rules on ourselves that become boxes that control us versus uplift us. So I think that's beautiful. And you guys, the book launches in March 18th. So we're putting this out early, so you have time to take advantage of those amazing offers that you've put together, and also the additional work you did to make sure that this book has so much complimentary so it's achievable for people. I really appreciate that. 


Lesley Logan 29:37  

You've given us a lot, especially with the goal stuff, but I do want to, I, you know, it's not a too long didn't listen. It's, you know, my high growth women, they we got to have some steps to be bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted. Because when you're inspired, you're like, okay, what I do next? So what do you have for us? 


Chris Janssen 29:53  

Like I said, stick to your commitments. Don't wait for motivation or inspiration. Commit and then get in action and just do it. And the subtitles of both my books are How to Show Up for the Life You Want and How to Show Up for the Sober Life You Want. So the word show up is my number one answer. Show up when you don't feel like it, right? Because it's easy to show up. And as achievers, we like feeling good. We like showing up to work out. There will be seasons or times or days or hours when we don't feel like showing up, and that's when we're going to show up anyway and stick to those commitments. 


Lesley Logan 30:30  

I do agree, because sometimes you're just like, you're down, you're exhausted, but you know what, when you show up, you always feel better.


Chris Janssen 30:39  

Yeah, always, I think it's easier to show up than to cancel or make up an excuse to yourself why or someone else why you didn't show up.


Lesley Logan 30:47  

You are correct, because the amount of time you spend trying to figure out how to get out of something, you could have just gone and done it. So exactly, I truly learned in ditching my perfection to say no first, and if I decided I want to do it, I could always go back and say yes, but this way I didn't say yes to something I didn't want to go to, and then I had to figure out to get out of it. So that's good. Yeah, I'm like, if my gut is saying I don't think I want to do this, it's better to say, let me get back to you. Or this is awesome. I don't think it's going to work out and then change my mind.


Chris Janssen 31:18  

I love that I am taking that with me. That's good. I need that. 


Lesley Logan 31:23  

Yes. Do you want to know something else that I also find? So even though everyone knows that your calendar is on your phone, everyone knows this, no one will actually say, oh, check your calendar right now, if you say you know what, I have to check my calendar, no one says that. They're like, Hey, I've got this thing going on on Saturday. And you can say, Oh, I have to check my calendar, and no one is going to be like, your calendars on your phone, really, truly, unless they're super pushy. They all just know that you're gonna go check it. And that buys me time to just see, like, how do I feel about that? Do I really want to go? Because sometimes people ask you things in a state that's like, not the like, you're feeling overwhelmed, and so that ask just feels overwhelming. But well, you really wanted to go, and then you'd have FOMO. So I just love to buy myself time, because it really helps. My husband has a tendency it's like a rebel. So he has no problems canceling on people, like just going, hey, it's not gonna work out. So sorry, let's take a new date. And I'm like, we can't we said we'd be there and we can't go. And I'm like, you know? So I learned through him. I'm like, let me just borrow a little of that rebelness for that. Before I let you go. Can we just I just want to go into because you said, don't wait for inspiration or motivation. Why can we not wait for those things? 


Chris Janssen 32:31  

Most days, I'm inspired and motivated, because that's what high growth people are. If you made a commitment and you want to reach a goal, you can't only do it when you're inspired to do it or motivated to do it, you have to just do it and show up when you don't want to. That's why I think we can't wait for those things if, because what if something happens? That's, you know, my husband and I lost a really good friend a few weeks ago, and it happened right before the wedding. Right? We can't go, oh, I don't feel like talking to all these guests. I mean, you kind of just have to grieve, then move into celebration mode, then go back to grieve. You just have to show up. You have to keep showing up. It can't be based on feelings, so we've got to make decisions.


Lesley Logan 33:16  

Thank you for sharing that example. I'm so sorry for your loss, but you're right. So many people would have been like, Oh, of course, they're going to be at the wedding, but they're not going to talk to people and they would understand. But also you would have missed out on so many wonderful moments of love and energy and community and family. So thank you so much, Chris, your book is beautiful, and I can't wait to read the rest of it, and you guys all are gonna go get it at her website. We'll have all those links in the show notes, and please, if you buy it and you buy it in bulk, tag, Chris. Tag, the Be It Pod, so we can celebrate it. This is also a wonderful book to give to your achieving friends. But again, book clubs, it doesn't have to be a sober book club. It can just be a club of women who are needing to kind of consider how they're setting up some outcomes for themselves, and Chris will walk alongside you. So thank you, Chris, so much for being here and everyone until next time, Be It Till You See It. 


Lesley Logan 34:10  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod. 


Brad Crowell 34:53  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.


Lesley Logan 34:58  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.


Brad Crowell 35:02  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.


Lesley Logan 35:09  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.


Brad Crowell 35:13  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.



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