488. Midlife Is Powerful When You Stop Dimming Your Light

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21:04

Lesley and Brad dive into an inspiring conversation with midlife health and fitness expert Heike Yates. They explore how to reignite your passions, overcome self-imposed limitations, and take action toward a fulfilling life. Learn how to stop over-researching and start doing, embrace change, and reclaim control over your future.


If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co.

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In this episode you will learn about:

  • Why midlife is the perfect time to rediscover what truly excites you.
  • The importance of taking action instead of over-researching new interests.
  • How to recognize and break free from limiting beliefs that hold you back.
  • Using journaling as a tool to uncover your true desires and goals.
  • How embracing failure can actually be the key to success.
  • The power of surrounding yourself with the right people to support your growth.
  • Why dimming your light for others is holding you back from your full potential.


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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

We start to go, I'm gonna research these different hobbies. I'm gonna try. And then we get overwhelmed in the researching of things, and not the doing of things. You're not gonna know if you like something. Just go do it. So just go, just jump in and go do it. 


Lesley Logan 0:13  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.


Lesley Logan 0:55  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the revitalizing convo I had with Heike Yates in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened tothis interview, you should pause. Go listen to that one, or listen to this one, then listen to that one. Binge listen. They're so fun to listen to. 


Brad Crowell 1:11  

Binge in.


Lesley Logan 1:11  

Yeah. Today is February 20th 2025 and it's World Day of Social Justice. World Day of Social Justice is observed annually on February 20th. Internationally, the world is plagued with unfortunate issues that prohibit millions of individuals from living a fair life. Many of the world’s population, through no fault of their own, are deprived of basic facilities, such as homes, jobs, healthcare, education, nutrition, and more. It must be the responsibility of the privileged to ensure that we can create a just world where social justice is a norm. How can we contribute to a social justice around the world from where we live? So you know what loves? I think that if you listen to this podcast, you're similar to me and Brad, and you are aware of all the shit that is going on. And there's.


Brad Crowell 1:53  

Lots of it. 


Lesley Logan 1:54  

Fuck ton of it. And it can feel overwhelming, and it could be hard not to know what to do. And then it can feel like, if you're championing one thing, that you're leaving other people behind. And I think it's one really important to note that it's absolutely okay if you care about one thing, and you can still have feeling and sadness and wish for something different somewhere else, but you can also make a massive change on one area and if you don't have the money to donate to the help of that, then your education and your expertise can also be donated. Your time can be donated. You can leverage the networks that you have, maybe work for a company, and you can ask them to do their next donation drive for something that you care about. There's change you can make. There is, gosh, one of my clients today was telling me that there's a charity organizational website where you can actually see what different charities are doing and see how they rank, as far as like, where their money goes. 


Brad Crowell 2:49  

That's cool. 


Lesley Logan 2:49  

And that is a great way to, if you don't have a lot of money to give to in justices to make sure that what you have can go the furthest. We, Brad and I, did a fundraiser for those who lost their jobs due to the wildfires in Los Angeles. And I know that's not the world and justice, but it's something that's pretty terrible for those people going through it. And the charity that we worked with, One Voice LA, 100% of your donations go to those who need it. You can actually go to onevoice-la I'm sure it's dot org. 


Brad Crowell 3:18  

onevoice-la.org


Lesley Logan 3:20  

Yeah. So you can go there, but there's definitely websites that you can use to research charities you're thinking of donating to, your time to, money to or leverage. And so I highly recommend that, because I also know that you have a whole life to live, and we can't save people without making sure that you are also taking care of you.


Brad Crowell 3:41  

I just pulled up two organizations that help measure charities. (inaudible) One is called Charity Navigator. 


Lesley Logan 3:46  

That's exactly what my artist is talking about. Shout out to Meredith Bender. Hi, babe. 


Brad Crowell 3:49  

The other one is called up Metrics, where you can measure and maximize your nonprofits impact. So I think this one's actually not this one might be like the business itself is trying to measure its own impact, whereas Charity Navigator, it sounds like we assess the direct impact of a charity's program relative to the cost required to run it to help donors identify high impact charities. So, you know, like the age-old story of, oh, you get these things in the mail every year for the annual Turkey drive, and then you write them a check for 50 bucks, and they take 45 of it to run the company and get $5 to the thing. Hopefully there are no organizations that do that, but obviously there are. So, Charity Navigator. Interesting. 


Lesley Logan 4:27  

So use that on this World Day of Social Justice. And also please remember that it is really hard to herd kittens and so there's a lot going on. Educate yourself. Stay educated, stay informed. But also give yourself permission to focus on one thing that you want to change. And also, call your congress person if you live in the United States. 


Brad Crowell 4:31  

It's not only about money. It's not only about donating to charity. Social justice is also political, and it's about championing those who can't champion themselves, right? I mean to me, literally, goes all the way back to what my parents taught me about the kids in the playground. Why are people picking on other kids? Because they feel like they can for some reason, and standing up against bullies is one of the best possible ways to advocate on behalf of others. And we obviously have a lot of bullies happening in politics in the United States. 


Lesley Logan 5:20  

There's bullies all over the world. 


Brad Crowell 5:22  

And all over the world. 


Lesley Logan 5:23  

And they only have the room to grow because we let them. So call your congress person. You can call them every day. Did you know that? 


Brad Crowell 5:31  

You can call them every day. 


Lesley Logan 5:32  

People do. Also get involved in your local things, because apparently not many people go to like local city council meetings. And so the loud assholes, the bullies win because there's no one else there. Indivisible.org. They send a lot of emails, not gonna lie. 


Brad Crowell 5:47  

Indivisible.org. 


Lesley Logan 5:47  

Yeah, indivisible. And you can find the city near you, and then they will help you see all the different groups you can join that are about the causes that you care about.


Brad Crowell 5:56  

I just signed up for their newsletter about my zip code. 


Lesley Logan 5:58  

Yeah, oh. 


Brad Crowell 6:00  

indivisible.org


Lesley Logan 6:00  

That's great. I didn't find that option, and now I'm just getting a lot of emails. 


Brad Crowell 6:04  

Right on the homepage. 


Lesley Logan 6:05  

So there you go. So this is why we need Brad. Okay, let's go through this really quick. We are, while you're listening to this, we are in Cambodia, and you can join us in October, because it's for sure too late now, we're already here.


Brad Crowell 6:17  

It's for sure too late, unless you live in Cambodia. Then come on over. 


Lesley Logan 6:20  

Yeah, come on over. Come say hi. So go to crowsnestretreats.com to sign up for our October retreat. We really want you there. It's beautiful. It's amazing. We spend a week together at our home and it's a true retreat. Really special. 


Brad Crowell 6:32  

Yeah. It's magic. 


Lesley Logan 6:33  

When we come back, we'll be heading over to POT in Denver. 


Brad Crowell 6:36  

Yeah, we're gonna drive through Utah, Arizona and Colorado to get there. Not sure about Arizona. We might go the north part. 


Lesley Logan 6:42  

Yeah, we're not doing any pop ups, don't, so we're on vacation. 


Brad Crowell 6:45  

Yeah, no pop ups but we are, we're gonna drive and we're going to be there in the area for the whole event. We're excited about it. It's gonna be awesome. 


Lesley Logan 6:52  

I've got some great workshops at it. So you can definitely still sign up. 


Brad Crowell 6:55  

I'll be hanging out the merch booth. 


Lesley Logan 6:56  

I know that they were almost sold out the last time I got a numbers count. So don't wait. 


Brad Crowell 7:00  

Crazy, right?


Lesley Logan 7:01  

Then in April 27th through May 3rd, we have spring training, spring Pilates training, you guys. 


Brad Crowell 7:07  

That's right from OPC. Go to opc.me/events. That will put you on the waitlist to find out about spring training. What is it going to be? Really quick. Go.


Lesley Logan 7:16  

Oh, it's all the OPC teachers and me teaching mat, reformer, a tower and a Wunda chair. You'll be able to buy a mat only ticket or an equipment plus mat ticket. So if you don't have access to the equipment, there'll be plenty of classes for you on just the mat. There are going to be all different levels, all different body types. And we're focused on one theme, and to find out what that theme is you got to go to opc.me/events and sign up, because I got to break the news to them first. Can't, that's worth, that's what we said. 


Brad Crowell 7:40  

All right, if you are taking money to teach a client, if you are personally getting paid by the client, then you run your own business. Congratulations. Or if you have a home studio or a brick and mortar, I want you to come join me for a free webinar called the growth accelerator. We're gonna cover three big secrets that Lesley and I have put together after coaching more than 2500 businesses just like yours over the past seven years with our agency coaching program. Come join me for this webinar, prfit.biz/accelerator. That's prfit.biz or profit without the O slash accelerator, and join me for free. Finally, last up, we have the Accessories Deck, the Accessories Flash Card Deck with OPC. It is the sixth and final deck. We are so close to being done. I know that the first draft is done. It's being reviewed right now. 


Lesley Logan 8:27  

This is the first Cambodia trip in years that I'm not writing a flash card on. 


Brad Crowell 8:31  

That's so crazy. 


Lesley Logan 8:32  

I know. What am I doing with my time? You guys. 


Brad Crowell 8:35  

Oh, we're gonna do other things with your time. 


Lesley Logan 8:36  

I have other things to write. I have blogs to write. I have a bot to edit. There's plenty for me to do.


Brad Crowell 8:43  

There's plenty to do but that's not what we're talking about. For the Accessories Deck. You know, we already did the photo shoot. It's looking really good. Lesley and I literally got a chance to meet the people who produce our flash cards when we were on tour. 


Lesley Logan 8:55  

That was so cool. 


Brad Crowell 8:56  

It was really lovely. We didn't actually get a chance to film anything because the entire place was closed for the holidays. So next time, I don't know if we'll ever be there when we're not there for the holidays, but one day, I would like to actually go see the operations. Let their team show us all these crazy machines that they use to make these flash cards. I'm fascinated by the process. Anyway, we're stoked to produce the sixth deck with them as well. We'll be dropping the presale really soon. So go to opc.me/flashcardwaitlist opc.me/flashcardwaitlist. Get yourself on the wait list. You will be the only people getting a 30% off offer on this final deck. So don't wait on that. Before we move on. We had a question.


Lesley Logan 9:37  

From YouTube. 


Brad Crowell 9:38  

Okay, jasminesaif183 says hi, Lesley, would you say you teach classical Pilates, and if we wanted to learn the real Pilates, is there a playlist we can follow on your channel?


Lesley Logan 9:52  

Yeah, so I do teach classical Pilates. That's what I would consider I teach, and anything on my channel is classical. So there's no need to make a playlist, because everything is what I will learn from Jay Grimes, who studied with Joe Pilates, what I learned from the Taylor sisters who studied with Romana. So I am a classical teacher, and so you're good to go with anything there. We do have playlists that are like the mat or by equipment, but I'm not gonna create a playlist that's just because that would be the whole YouTube channel. 


Brad Crowell 10:24  

Yeah, yeah. So. 


Lesley Logan 10:26  

I also just want to say, in case, because she wrote real Pilates in here.


Brad Crowell 10:29  

I was gonna ask you to address that. 


Lesley Logan 10:31  

I refuse to get involved in a conversation about what's real Pilates and what's not real Pilates. I won't do that because.


Brad Crowell 10:38  

Unless it's not Pilates in the least. 


Lesley Logan 10:40  

Unless it's not Pilates in the least. Like a Megaformer. There might be some moves that are Pilates esque, but you I can't from their website 10 years ago. I cannot teach Pilates moves on a Megaformer and they cannot teach their moves on a regular reformer. It was from. 


Brad Crowell 10:53  

That's clearly not Pilates. 


Lesley Logan 10:55  

Yeah. So, so that being said, they might be telling people that's what they're doing. They might be telling their teachers or their trainers that's what they're doing. And I don't ever want to be the person who busts anyone's bubbles. So here's the deal. There's a lot of different Pilates styles out there, and most of them are all real Pilates. Now I teach what Joseph Pilates created with his intentions. 


Brad Crowell 11:14  

From the book that he wrote. 


Lesley Logan 11:15  

Yeah, from his book and from his teachings of his client, and I do the best I can to uphold what that purpose is. And if you were trained in a different way and you want to learn what I'm doing, great if you're training a different way and you don't want to learn the way I'm doing it, great. This world is a place where you get to. 


Brad Crowell 11:32  

You do you, baby.


Lesley Logan 11:33  

You do you and you don't even have to explain it to me. I have no judgment, but I think it's really important to not get bogged down by the semantics of it, but there are styles, just like in yoga, there's yoga styles, and so if you find a style you like, keep going. 


Brad Crowell 11:48  

Yeah, I agree. All right, y'all. Stick around we'll be right back. We're gonna dig into this fantastic convo that Lesley had with Heike Yates. We'll be right back. 


Brad Crowell 11:57  

Okay, welcome back. Now, let's talk about Heike Yates. Heike Yates is a midlife health and fitness expert with over 35 years of experience, and she's the host of the pursue your spark podcast with a rich background as a seasoned Pilates coach and former Ironman triathlete, Heike is dedicated to helping women in midlife build strength, confidence in health. Through her podcast and coaching, she empowers women to embrace new possibilities, overcome challenges and lead vibrant, fulfilling lives, and she's working on a book and everything. It was really fascinating to listen to her share her story about how she was not raised in a society that intentionally worked out, meaning, I'm gonna block off one hour and go work out. Because where she was raised in Germany, your life was a workout. You were walking everywhere. You were hiking up and down mountains. You were doing all this stuff, because that's she you did. And then she said, when she got pregnant, her body obviously went through a dramatic change, and she gained 50 pounds, and then had no idea how to lose that. And so that is what took her down this path. And I feel like there's a generational thing there, too, for sure, she got into all the different things, and she went down all these different modalities over the decades, which I thought was really amazing.


Lesley Logan 13:13  

Yeah, I also like that she's really inspired to help women find their spark again. So it's not just about the movement of it, which I think for women in midlife, I don't know why it feels old. It feels like we're making it worse. 


Brad Crowell 13:25  

Well, I think the reason. 


Lesley Logan 13:26  

Because I'm 42. I'm not at midlife, when's midlife?


Brad Crowell 13:29  

Well, I think the reason that she's not saying pre post menopause is because it pigeon holes her into talking only about menopause. And you know, when she was talking about her book, she said, yes, some of the publishers were coming to me and saying, like, great, you're a menopause author, and she's like, but I'm not, you know, so I think she's using midlife to encompass a little bit of a wider audience there.


Lesley Logan 13:30  

Yeah. So I really was drawn to more what she was talking about women in midlife and having lost touch with their true desires. I also think because, again, you brought up generations, I think that my friends today have had more people tell them to know what their goals are and what they want outside of being a parent. And I think 10 plus years women older than us, like it was, you're a mom, that's what you did, and it was really weird if you were more than that, if you did anything else. So I do think that it's necessary to talk with those women about how to figure out that it's because also our desires change, and so you might have known what they were before, but then life happens. You go through and the things that brought you joy don't bring your joy the same way they do, and you have to have new desires, right? So I really want to say that she encouraged listeners to look not at what you can't do, but what possibilities are there. Focus on what is possible. You know, we talk about that all the time at OPC, so you know, I'm gonna love that 


Brad Crowell 13:50  

Sure. 


Lesley Logan 13:52  

She also said, if you don't try anything, you will never find what it is that lights you up. 


Brad Crowell 14:38  

So take messy action. 


Lesley Logan 14:45  

Yeah and I thought that was fun, because I think we start to go, I gotta research these different hobbies. I'm gonna try. And then we get overwhelmed in the researching of things, and not the doing of things. You're not gonna know if you like something. Let's just go do it. So just go, just jump in and go do it.


Brad Crowell 15:00  

Yeah. And one thing I found like a through line, and she didn't explicitly say this, but she did explicitly say, when you're trying to understand your goals, don't listen to what other people tell you that your goals should be. You need to find your goals yourself. And she kind of said it and then brought it back up again later on in the conversation. And so, you know, she encouraged honesty about our own desires, saying, when we look at ourselves, we've got to be honest about what we want, right? And then you asked, hey, what if you don't know what you want? Because you were talking about the retreat in Cambodia where you're like, hey, what does a year from now look like? And then people got they found that as a roadblock. They couldn't do the exercise because, like, I don't know what I want to be in a year, right? And so you asked her, What happens if you hit that hurdle yourself? And she said, You need to start journaling and paying attention to the desires that you have during your journaling. But ultimately, that still lends itself directly back to knowing your goals, your desires, not letting other people define your goals for you. I thought that was really important. I also think it's hard. I think it's really hard, especially when we feel boxed in by the life that we have today. Maybe your goal was something that is just literally not even possible because you have a job that keeps you in one place all the time, and you can't travel, you can't leave, or, I don't know, you have young kids that demand a lot of time, and now you have to wait to accomplish your goal. So I think that it's hard to decide what our goals can be, that we're willing to let ourselves pursue without knowing that it will fail because of the boxes that we live in, right?


Lesley Logan 16:38  

Yeah. I also think that we if we fail, then it wasn't worth doing, or we weren't deserving of it, or whatever and it's like.


Brad Crowell 16:43  

Then we feel guilty because we let ourselves down or something. 


Lesley Logan 16:46  

I mean, how many times did someone fill the light bulb? A lot. And now if we fucking stop, we wouldn't have had light as soon as we did. So.


Brad Crowell 16:55  

Yeah and she did talk about failure, too. She said it's not failure. It's just, you know, it's the next step. It's the next baby step. She pointed out that many women feel stuck. They're either waiting for an answer to appear from the universe, or they're scared to fail, right? And her advice was, don't sit there frozen. Take action. Don't wait. It's okay to fail because we never actually do. It's something. We try something, we might not like it and then it's okay to change and shift your goal and reclaim control of your life. So she said, take action, and that's going to be the thing that moves you forward. And you know how much we're all about messy action. So, yeah. I think she's just also very kind. 


Lesley Logan 17:34  

Yeah, she's got spunk to her. I really like it. 


Brad Crowell 17:37  

Yeah, I think as a coach, she's just very warm, you know, all around as good vibes. All right, well stick around, because we do have some,Be It Action Items from Heike. We're going to find out about those in just a second. 


Brad Crowell 17:49  

All right, so finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Heike Yates? To find what lights you up, start journaling. I did briefly mention this before. She said write down your thoughts. Start thinking about the things that maybe you're envying your friends for which I thought that's interesting. Normally, I was raised where, like, don't be jealous, don't feel envy. And she's actually saying not that you should tap into that and lean into that, but understand what's happening. Notice that. What is it that you're feeling that about? Write it down and then say, I want what she has, whatever that is, and give yourself the permission to say, to be honest, I want that. Look around for inspiration. Ask yourself, what are my friends doing? What do they do? Try activities that they enjoy or explore something new for yourself. She said, even if you don't know what you want, trying anything helps you discover what lights you up and what you don't like, which helps you narrow down what you do. Yeah.


Lesley Logan 18:47  

Yeah. I love she had so many great Be It Action Items, and so I also want to highlight that she said stop dimming your light and move on and enjoy life. And I love this, because often, as women, we were raised, you're too loud, you're too bossy, you're too this. We talked about this with Tracy Peterson, like you're too bossy, you're too this, you're too, like, all these things that actually people telling you that it's like a little thing where they're saying, turn your light down. It's too much. And actually, Heike is saying it's bold to keep your light on, move on and enjoy your life. And I think that that is the best thing we can do, because we're not going to keep everyone with us all the time. We're just not. And so dimming your light to stay in the box that other people want you in, it'd be a real shame, and that is not what you're trying to do when you're trying to be it till you see it. I'm Lesley Logan. 


Brad Crowell 19:32  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 


Lesley Logan 19:33  

Please make sure you share your takeaways with Heike, the Be It Pod. Share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Share this with one of your midlife friends who needs to hear someone kind telling them things that might feel very familiar to them, and helping them enjoy their life more and until next time, Be It Till You See It. 


Brad Crowell 19:46  

Bye for now. 


Lesley Logan 19:48  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.


Brad Crowell 20:30  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.


Lesley Logan 20:35  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.


Brad Crowell 20:40  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.


Lesley Logan 20:47  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.


Brad Crowell 20:50  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.



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