464. Cool Tips to Empower Your Best Life

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Dive into this final rewind episode filled with cool advice to fuel your growth. Join Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell for the final installment of their rewind series, where they revisit some of the coolest advice from past episodes. From redefining strength and outgrowing fear to setting boundaries and expanding your network, these insights will empower you to Be It Till You See It.


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In this episode you will learn about:

  • Building diverse connections to spark growth and innovation.
  • Outgrowing fear by facing it head-on.
  • Using boundaries to create space for fulfillment.
  • Redefining strength and challenging limitations.


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Episode Transcript:

Chris Goodman 0:00  

I went through a really nasty divorce in 2015. That's putting it lightly. And I started dating my current wife in 2017. And of course, as we got serious, I started to have fears. What if we fall in love and get married and it blows up like the last one did?


Lesley Logan 0:16  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.


Lesley Logan 0:59  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It rewind series that we are doing. This is our last of the rewind episodes. 


Brad Crowell 1:06  

Wow, can't believe we made it here. 


Lesley Logan 1:07  

I know. And so, these are four clips. They're not the only amazing clips we could have picked, but they are the ones we chose for you this year. 


Brad Crowell 1:15  

But they are the coolest. 


Lesley Logan 1:16  

And that's what this is. This is the cool advice episode. Honestly, what happened is, okay, I was going through our entire catalog. I did this. I went through the entire catalog, and I basically was just like, oh, this person, go here, this one, go here. And we had two that didn't have like titles yet. And so it's kind of like, oh, I really like these two. All these two are kind of like this, right? So that's where the bold moments came from. So this cool advice was just like, I just fucking like these people. And how did we not already choose them yet? I don't know. So, I know we already have, like, a potpourri category, but we have another one, and this one's called Cool. So we're.


Lesley Logan 1:17  

This one's less generic than that, but still in there.


Lesley Logan 1:52  

Just don't, even, but there, but the people are anything but generic. 


Brad Crowell 1:55  

It doesn't make the advice bad. It's just categorizing them. It's awesome. 


Lesley Logan 2:01  

Okay, well.


Brad Crowell 2:02  

We're on it. 


Lesley Logan 2:02  

You know what? This is like, Cool Ranch. Okay? 


Brad Crowell 2:04  

It's Cool Ranch. It goes on anything. 


Lesley Logan 2:06  

It goes on anything. 


Brad Crowell 2:06  

That's right. 


Lesley Logan 2:07  

And we're gonna talk about how to meet people. We're gonna talk about outgrowing fear. We're gonna talk about boundaries, which, by the way, this episode is dropping the day after Christmas, and you're probably feeling like you have some boundaries you need to set up or re-establish, or, I don't know, you probably thought about that yesterday, so that clip is definitely going to help you. That whole episode's epic, and we're gonna talk about redefining strength. Actually, this is it. We're talking about Javeno McLean because he's fucking cool. 


Brad Crowell 2:33  

Javeno is so cool. 


Lesley Logan 2:34  

He's so cool. I mean, my goodness, I watched it when I first asked him to be on the podcast. He has like 45,000 followers now he's like almost 700,000, like, slain and just inspiring the fuck out of people. So let's get into the cool episodes. 


Brad Crowell 2:48  

I'm all about it. Here we go. 


Lesley Logan 2:50  

All right, let's kick things off with Dr. Kelly Bender, Episode 41 about Finding the People in the Room Who Are Not Like You. Y'all, if you need friends in your life, you need a network, you need anything like this, this clip is going to give you a powerful tip.


Brad Crowell 3:06  

Yeah. And Kelly also talked about how to meet people. And she is a doctor, obviously, and she decided to start going to meetups where there were not doctors in the room. And that was on purpose. And I thought that was really kind of clever, even though it might not seem that intuitive. It was great.


Lesley Logan 3:21  

Well, because here's the deal, like, and I know we have a lot of Pilates people listening to this, so I want to make sure you do not take offense at this. But I love a Pilates conference. I really do. But I also have a lot more fun meeting people who have nothing to do with my industry, because I actually pick up on ideas that are unique and different or I. 


Brad Crowell 3:40  

Well how you can support other people. 


Lesley Logan 3:41  

Well, also it's how I can grow my own business, because I actually like what we've created wasn't just for Pilates people. It's for people who love Pilates. And so this advice is really important to like, kind of help you cast your net a little further out. 


Brad Crowell 3:56  

Yeah, love it. All right, here we go.


Dr. Kelly Bender 3:58  

So one of the big things that I tell people the be it till you see it kind of a thing is putting things in your physical environment that make you feel happy or that make you feel that desired state. So one of the things is, I, I've got, you know, I've got my plants, I've got my crystals, you know, I've got all of the things that kind of just make me feel like I'm that person. And one of the biggest things that changed, I had some money mindset stuff. Being a doctor, being a care provider, I just like giving care for free, right? Like I just wish I could give care for free. It makes me feel so good, but that's not a sustainable business model. So what I did when I wanted to change how I felt about money was I took $200 bills and put it, I have this little kind of seashell type thing that I put them in with my Amethyst from when I was little on top of it, and it's right over here where I do my work. And I just have it there, and it's like money is around. Money is available. If I need 100 bucks, I could grab it from there, right? I don't, because I'm just putting it there, but physically putting the things in your space to remind you of what you want to grow and what you want to focus on, I think is really important. 


Lesley Logan 5:17  

Oh, I love this. 


Dr. Kelly Bender 5:19  

Yeah. And then absolutely like adding people to your environment, to your friend group, find the people who are not like you. That's what I would say. A lot of times, we tend to be friends with the people that are very similar to us, because they reinforce our beliefs and it makes us feel good about ourselves. But I would encourage you to find people who are very different from you, because they're going to have life experiences and they're going to have skill sets that are complimentary to yours, that you might need or you might benefit from. I started working with very, very, very, very high-net-worth individuals, and completely changed how I saw life, how I saw my own like, how I run my household. Just seeing how people run their household, how they run staff, helped me understand what was possible. 


Lesley Logan 6:21  

That's so interesting. 


Dr. Kelly Bender 6:21  

So I specifically went to meetups that were not medical related. So most of the people I knew who were doctors, they went to all these medical ones to network with other medical professionals. And I was like, first of all, I want friends who are not doctors. Second of all, I like, you're not going to become my patients. You're doctors. And third, I actually went to a lot of them that were, like, business-oriented, because I was like, I need friends or people who are in business to help me learn how to do this. And so, you know, I would, I would psych myself up, and I, this is not a thing that I love to do, so I really, you know, there was a lot of anxiety before everyone but I was like, you know, what's the worst that can happen? That's what I would tell myself. What's the worst that can happen? You're gonna go, you're gonna meet some interesting people, and if you don't like them, you never have to see them again. So that's the nice thing about meetups, is everybody is there to network. So it's different than going to a bar or something like that. Everyone knows that's the deal. So you go up and you tell your story, and you hand out business cards. 


Lesley Logan 7:25  

All right, that was episode 41 and with Dr. Kelly Bender, we love her, and she had another episode with us, by the way. Go, just search for her name on the Be It Pod. You'll find it. Brad's going to come up with it at some point, but don't worry, we'll put it in the show notes, too. Now, we're moving on to Episode 141, I promise you that wasn't on purpose. We're gonna talk about outgrowing fear. So this episode with Chris Goodman could be seen as a business episode, but actually, I just really think is applicable to everybody, because fear keeps us from being it till we see it tenfold, 100% hands down, any other metaphor, cliche thing you'd say they're like, fear is what stops people. And one of the things I love that he said, that we're gonna get into, is how a decision rooted in fear will create results rooted in fear. And, oh, that stings, because we know it. Like, you know it's so true, when you do something out of fear, and then the thing comes and it's also just crap, because it was like, it's like, you planted the seed in fear. So it grew a fear plant.


Brad Crowell 8:24  

Yeah. And he kind of continued that metaphor, and basically said he had to outgrow the fear that he was in. Anyway, it's a very inspiring episode. Here we go. 


Chris Goodman 8:34  

It's such a great point, because people tend to discount how much a decision rooted in fear will create results rooted in fear, right? And you see, I imagine many of your Pilates instructors are going through this right now that they've been so conservative in their pricing, even though they're bringing tremendous value, that they keep making decisions, like, backing away from the fear. And so they keep getting people who want to pay bottom dollar prices, right? And so they get clients who are not, maybe necessarily respectful of their time, or do the exercises they tell them to do, or whatever. I worked with lots of physical therapists, and this seems to be a trend that when we are in fear and we make a decision like, well, I can't raise rates because then I'll lose clients. They're definitely not doing anything to attract the people who want to pay a, for instance, premium, a luxury price for a luxury service. And so they don't get those people, those people go somewhere else, and it's sort of a race to the bottom.


Lesley Logan 9:36  

So is it possible to outlearn a fear? I think so.


Chris Goodman 9:39  

I genuinely believe it is. I'll pick on myself for an example, here, I went through a really nasty divorce in 2015, that's putting it lightly, and I started dating my current wife in 2017 and of course, as we got serious, I started to have fears, well, what if we fall in love and get married and it blows up like the last one did, right? I had to outlearn that fear. I had to outgrow, I think outgrow is probably a better term, and the only way I could do that was by facing it head on. So when the time came to let Lindsey, my wife, know how serious I was and how committed to this relationship was, I told her, I said, I think this is really going somewhere. And she said, well, that's tough because I'm not sure it is. And I have a lot of fears and I have a lot of doubt right now. I didn't even think. I just blurted it out. I said, well, that really sucks, because I'm in love with you. And talk about running into your fear head long. I mean, tell somebody that just told you they're not sure about the relationship, that you love them, and put your heart out there to get stomped on. And she looked like I threw paint all over her. She was just like, what? Like, I'm growing antlers. What? And this look washed over her face and her eyes welled up with tears. And she said, I'm in love with you too. I'm just terribly afraid right now. I'm so afraid, and so we use this as an example all the time when we do podcasts, because we're both afraid. She had had bad relationships, failed relationships, two relationships that went four years each. It's not like we have somehow strapped on this armor as coaches that allows us to walk through anything with no fear. Not the case. It is that we accept it as sort of a mission to run headlong into it and all the discomfort that comes with it and outgrow it anyway.


Lesley Logan 11:32  

All right, so that was 141 if you want to dive more into the fear topic, I hope you do. Now we're gonna go to 153 so we're not (inaudible).


Brad Crowell 11:40  

We're going backwards in time. 


Lesley Logan 11:41  

We're going backwards in time. We're not, we're going forward. Like, a week later we had Tanya Dalton.


Brad Crowell 11:45  

Oh, yeah, 141, 153, yeah, you know.


Lesley Logan 11:47  

Yeah, it'll be two weeks. Tanya Dalton is incredible author, and she has several books out. One of them was the JOMO, which is like the joy of messing out. But this episode was about boundaries, and she is a mom, she's a busy woman, and we talked about the importance of boundaries, and she gave incredible example, a visual example, about how important boundaries are. And if you struggle with enforcing boundaries, I want to tell you, the resentment you're feeling is because of that, because we're the only people who can build our own boundaries, and then we have to enforce them, which can make us feel like we're being rude or demanding or whatever. But you have to understand that boundaries are very helpful. In fact, they're so helpful that Tanya explains all of that in this episode. 


Brad Crowell 12:33  

Yeah, this is a great one tune in. 


Tanya Dalton 12:35  

I think it's so poignant and helpful for people to understand why we need boundaries. If you were to imagine a school that's next to a busy road, there's no fence, the teachers are going to let the kids go out for recess, but they're going to say, like, stay close, right? Because we don't want them running out to the road, so the kids have to play close to the school and where the teachers can keep an eye on them. But if there is a school next to a busy road and they put up a fence, same school put up a fence around it, the kids can go to all the corners of the field. They can go play kickball over here, and play hide and go seek over there, and they can take advantage of the full field. And that's what boundaries do. It allows us to have this container that we can explore and we can play, and we can really enjoy ourselves fully, because we have that container, because we have that boundary, and then we can go inside and do the next thing, right? And that's what I love about boundaries, is when we have them in place, when we have good, healthy boundaries, it feels so good. It really does. 


Brad Crowell 13:35  

Okay. I hope you enjoyed Episode 153, with Tanya Dalton talking about boundaries. So the next person is the epitome of cool, I must say. Mr. Javeno McLean, Episode 205. Wow. What an empowering, inspirational, incredible human he is. 


Lesley Logan 13:55  

We talk about him all the time. 


Brad Crowell 13:57  

You want to cry tears of joy? Watch his Instagram. It will bring you to tears every single time. It's just so fun to see how he empowers other people. 


Lesley Logan 14:06  

Also, like we obviously can't put his entire episode here, because you're gonna go listen to his entire episode. 


Brad Crowell 14:10  

Yeah, go back and listen to it on the pod. 


Lesley Logan 14:12  

You gotta go listen to it. Because he really talks about how we can hold people back, how we can look at people who are different than us and think, oh, they can't do things. And he is actually redefining what is possible. And I think he's an inspiration for all of us. Sometimes we're like, I can't do this because of this. Oh, I can't do this because of this. I can't do this because of this. And, like, there's no because of this for him, he's like, oh, yet, here we go. Let's move this thing one more notch up and see what you can do. And, my goodness.


Brad Crowell 14:12  

I just think it's incredible that he takes the time and the money and the effort to literally create a space and buy all this equipment, and then he spends the time to empower people who need the support. And I think it is just so powerful.


Lesley Logan 14:59  

That they need the support, and also they need someone to believe in the possibilities 


Brad Crowell 15:04  

For them. 


Lesley Logan 15:05  

For them because.


Brad Crowell 15:06  

He provides that. 


Lesley Logan 15:07  

I'm a Pilates instructor, and so people come to me and say, my doctor says I can't (inaudible) on my spine. And they're like, I can't do any of those things. I can't do that. I can't do that. I can't do this. And the way I look at bodies is like, okay, well, what can you do? And the way that Javeno is going to inspire all of us is like, really focusing on, like, let's redefine what you think your weaknesses and see what strengths are possible. And I don't know, get ready to fill chills up and down. I already have chills. I'm just having chills thinking about it. So here's Javeno McLean.


Brad Crowell 15:37  

Enjoy.


Javeno McLean 15:38  

One thing with me, Les, is always about normality and redefining boundaries. I've always been that person, and I think normality is the most powerful thing on this planet. And I realized a long time ago, no matter who you are, whether you're, no matter what your condition, elderly, disabled, whatever it is, all anybody wants us to be treated normal. And me, now, I'm a father of two young boys, and God forbid if anything was to happen to my little boys, all I want is the world to treat my babies normal. Don't feel sorry for them and don't pity them. Treat them normal. And years ago, Les, long story short, I was, I used to manage sessions. We call it the council, in the USA, you call it the government baby. I used to work for the government, and I used to do sessions all around the city of Manchester. And I had a I had people that worked for me. And I'm watching a session with this young guy, one of my members and staff, and he was teaching this young boy in a wheelchair. This young boy was, he was so bored. He was so, so bored. He was 19 and I watched the session, and he stayed in his wheelchair, Les, and but when the trainer went to go to the bathroom, this boy got up out of his chair, and he walked over to where the water and the drinks was, and he poured himself a drinks. So I came in the room, and I went crazy at him. I said to him, don't you ever let another man or another person dilute your power. Don't ever let nobody tell you that you're meant to be in that chair like that chair defines you. I said, I've just watched you for 20 minutes lift the two pound weights, big strapping rugby player boy, and he was lifting weights that he knows he can do more. He could get apart from his chair. He could walk, like a lot of disabled people, or a lot of people in wheelchairs. They're not always in the wheelchairs forever. A lot of them can actually get up and move. And I said to him, don't ever let nobody dilute your power and tell you that you have to stay in that wheelchair. So when the trainer came back in, I said, you know what? You go home. I said, I'm going to take the rest of this session, and for the rest of the session, I made him stand up because I knew that he could, and even if he couldn't, I said, I've got you, I said, you're going to push yourself. You're 19 years old. And I said, you got all this life to live. You can't live an attacked life by just being locked in your little box and letting the world and people tell you, you stay in your wheelchair. You do, I said, No. So I made him stand up for 20 minutes, and he did it. I made him lift the the bigger dumbbells, nothing crazy, but a little bit heavier than what I know we could do. And at the end of the session, this is what changed for me, Lesley, this is where it was a little bit awkward, where this little boy's parents was in the room and his dad was massive. His dad was huge. His dad was so big. And he walked over, and I thought, I don't know what's going to happen, Les, I don't know what will happen, because I didn't know. And he came over and he just started crying, and me and him hugged for about 20 minutes, him and his wife, and we cried, and he was explaining to me everything that they everything that I was saying to him people are scared to say to him because of his wheelchair. And he said they tell him every day that you're lazy, you can do more, but because it's mommy and daddy, he doesn't want to listen. And he said I was the first person to ever talk to him and treat him normal, because the world, when it comes to people that are disabled or elderly or vulnerable, they've got a thing where they don't want to offend and they don't want to tell him anything. So they said to me, I was the first person to treat him normal, and they could. They loved it. They loved it. And I said to myself on that day, because you're in a wheelchair while disabled, you ain't no different from me or you or anybody else. 


Lesley Logan 19:22  

Was that epic or was it epic? 


Brad Crowell 19:24  

I mean, this guy, I I'm so excited I can't wait to meet him in person.


Lesley Logan 19:29  

I'm just gonna go listen to this episode now. 


Brad Crowell 19:31  

Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready. I'm ready. 


Lesley Logan 19:33  

Okay, so this is the last of our rewind series. Again, we want to know if you like the rewind series. If you want this to be an annual tradition. Of course, we'll pick different episodes. If you have topics that you would like us to do a rewind episode on. We want to know. 


Brad Crowell 19:47  

Yeah or if there was an episode that you thought was super powerful and really impacted you that, we didn't cover, tell us that, and we'll go back. And they are definitely going to be those as well. So. 


Lesley Logan 19:57  

We're not going anywhere. We are on the top 1.5% and I have a huge goal for this coming year, and it requires your help. 


Brad Crowell 20:03  

It does so I share this episode. 


Lesley Logan 20:05  

Share this episode. Here's my goal I'm gonna share with you. I want to hasten. Is that the right word? I want to quicken. I hasten the time to go from 1.5% to 1% and not because I'm not, I'm unsatiable When we go from 1.5% to 1% it means even more, like, thousands of people are, lives are being changed because of this podcast. We can't do that a lot. 


Brad Crowell 20:29  

Well, not only that, it also allows us to put this pod in front of even more amazing guests. 


Lesley Logan 20:35  

But also, yeah, get more guests, more amazing guests. If someone's like, you should get Michelle Obama on. And I'm like, yeah, so. 


Brad Crowell 20:41  

We will. 


Lesley Logan 20:41  

We will. Somebody explain to you how Michelle Obama says yes, probably money, but also .5%. I'm not asking you to get me to .5% next year, although you can. That's an Abraham Hicks thing, not asking for it right now, although it can be. But the more you share this episode, the more you listen to our podcast, the more reviews we get, we go from 1.5% to 1% we don't, you can't skip, we don't skip ahead and then we'll go to 1% and then a .5% we're here to this podcast until we reach as many people as when, when people start saying, I'm being it till I see it everywhere and like its own cliche, its own thing, that people just say all the time, then we will go, okay, hold on now that everyone's being it until we see it, what are we gonna do? But this mission is here to help change people's lives. And it's not because we want to change people's lives. We actually want you to. If you are being it until you see it, if you have all the answers and the help and the support to be it till you see it, then you change people's lives. And even if you don't, you don't have to be in your own business person to change people's lives. You can change people's life, maybe the parent and a spouse and a friend and a sister and a coworker and a neighbor. 


Brad Crowell 21:46  

You can change your own life by being it until you see it. 


Lesley Logan 21:48  

Well that, yeah, that's actually probably, change your life first, because then you can take people with you.


Lesley Logan 21:55  

I'm Lesley Logan.


Brad Crowell 21:56  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 


Lesley Logan 21:57  

And you know what to do, Be It Till You See It. 


Brad Crowell 22:00  

Bye for now.


Lesley Logan 22:02  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.


Brad Crowell 22:44  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.


Lesley Logan 22:49  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.


Brad Crowell 22:54  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.


Lesley Logan 23:01  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.


Brad Crowell 23:04  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.



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