Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell break down the powerful conversation with keynote speaker and coach John Mollura, exploring how perfectionism, procrastination, and overthinking quietly chip away at your self-trust. They unpack why these three all stem from fear, how they derail the small promises you make to yourself, and why that matters more than you think. This recap is your reminder that confidence isn’t a mystery; it’s built through honest awareness and daily follow-through.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at beit@lesleylogan.co mailto:beit@lesleylogan.co.

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In this episode you will learn about:

The shift from self-judgment to a seeker mindset that opens new direction.
How changing lanes later in life reflects growth rather than starting over.
The Big Three that derail meaningful actions by operating from fear.
Breaking your own commitments as the root cause behind loss of self-trust.
Why honoring tiny choices today makes you a hero to your future self.

Episode References/Links:

Black Friday Cyber Monday Sale - https://opc.me/bfcm
OPC Winter Tour - https://opc.me/tour
Pilates Journal Expo - https://xxll.co/pilatesjournal
Cambodia Retreat Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
Agency Mini - https://prfit.biz/mini
Contrology Pilates Conference in Poland - https://xxll.co/poland
Contrology Pilates Conference in Brussels - https://xxll.co/brussels
Pilates on Tour - https://www.pilates.com
Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions
John Mollura's Website - https://www.johnmollura.com
John Mollura’s Free Resources - https://www.johnmollura.com/freestuff
Episode 119: John Mollura - https://beitpod.com/ep119
Episode 592: Dr. Jill Allen - https://beitpod.com/ep592

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Resources:

Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g
Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/
Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/
Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/
Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ
Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

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Episode Transcript:

Brad Crowell 0:00

These three behaviors constantly derail us from doing the things that we want to do or the things that we say are so important for us. And he said, all three of them share the same root. Okay, what is the root of perfectionism, procrastination and overthinking?

Lesley Logan 0:15

Drum roll please.

Brad Crowell 0:18

Fear.

Lesley Logan 0:21

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 1:03

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the encouraging convo I have with John Mollura in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one, and then listen to this one, or listen to this one and then listen to that one. They're fun, back-to-back, to be completely honest, in whatever order you want to do. And John Mollura, he said this is his second time on the pod.

Brad Crowell 1:28

Yeah, the first one he was in the hundos.

Lesley Logan 1:27

Yeah. I know. Is that crazy? It's insane.

Brad Crowell 1:28

Yeah, yeah. Like this probably puts him almost 500 episodes ago.

Lesley Logan 1:34

I know. Who else should we bring back? Send it in, guys.

Brad Crowell 1:38

Let us know.

Lesley Logan 1:38

Today is Thursday, November 27th 2025 and for Americans, it is Turkey Day.

Brad Crowell 1:46

It's Thanksgiving Day.

Lesley Logan 1:47

Yes, but it's also for Americans and anyone else wants to celebrate, Un-Thanksgiving Day.

Brad Crowell 1:54

That's right.

Lesley Logan 1:54

Let's, before people get upset, this is what Un-Thanksgiving Day is. It's also known as National Day of Mourning, or Indigenous People's Sunrise Ceremony, is commemorated on the fourth Thursday in November. That is on purpose, because, well, I'll tell you more in a second, this place, it takes a place on November 27th but it just happens on to be on the same Thursday as Thanksgiving, because it's always the fourth Thursday. And it actually there's a big thing over on Alcatraz Island in San Francisco Bay to honor the indigenous peoples of America and promote their rights. And the reason why we do this is because, well, there's also, naturally a mourning is what they do in Boston, but what they do in happened in at Alcatraz is when it was no longer being used as a prison, the indigenous people went and took over the island, and they lived in it and inhabited and controlled it for 19 months. And it's kind of amazing. It's basically them taking their land back, which is very beautiful on we didn't do this because we'll have episodes come on Monday, but I really love that on Columbus Day, the day formerly known as Columbus Day in this household, but known as Indigenous People's Day, somebody, somebody posted a meme that said a reminder that on this day in 1492 indigenous people discovered Columbus lost at sea, or whatever day it was. I don't know if I heard the year correctly, but I love it. It's like, yeah, you fucking discovered this place. You so. So anyways, if you're like me and Brad, sometimes these holidays are kind of hard to celebrate, because, like, of course, I want to spend time with family. Of course I'll spend time with friends. Of course, we need days off, and we do need some joy, but I think finding new ways to educate ourselves and then celebrate those people is wise.

Brad Crowell 3:48

Yeah, or just to have some clarity around the history of a holiday, you know, like, like, like, historically, the Romans would take the conquered people's holidays, and, you know, morph them so that the people could still celebrate, and then over time, things would change, you know. And now, all of a sudden, we have, you know, things like Christmas or Halloween or whatever, you know. And they've been, they've been basically taken over, and Thanksgiving is, is, I don't think Thanksgiving was taken over, but Thanksgiving has a different premise.

Lesley Logan 4:22

There's a folkloric story about, like, what happened I'm like this, but (inaudible).

Brad Crowell 4:25

But it's, well, it's, yeah, it's well, it's, it's that, you know, we came, we saw, we conquered, kind of thing and we did that. But it's a day of thanks, right? Thanks for this new land that we took from people. So, you know, thank you for that.

Lesley Logan 4:41

It's like a bully kicking a kid taking a lunch, going, thanks, man.

Brad Crowell 4:43

You know, so so I still think that we can have a day where we we are thankful for the things that we have and family and those things. But I think it's also fair to to to recognize that, you know, like that, like for the native people of this continent. They they want to remember their history too, and the genocide of indigenous people that happened when we came over here, so.

Lesley Logan 5:12

Yeah, and I just think, like, Hallmark washing, and no offense to that company, but like, just making everything, like this beautiful day to like, you know, go out and buy decorations and all this different stuff. It's like, I think you can have a day of thanks, I think. But I also think, like, it is, it is important that we're educating ourselves about the people that have been hurt by this kind of stuff, and also, like, have a day of thanks and be thankful for them and what they did on, you know, for this land before we got here.

Brad Crowell 5:39

Yeah, Thanks for Thanks for going down that journey with us.

Lesley Logan 5:42

Yeah, Happy Thanksgiving Day.

Brad Crowell 5:44

Yeah, it's intentionally on Thanksgiving every year. It's the fourth, same as the fourth, fourth Thursday of November.

Lesley Logan 5:50

So and you know what? Here's the deal, if you're like guys, thanks, totally understand. You know, honor them every day. And I love Thanksgiving. That is very, very cool. But for some people who are having a hard time right now with this holiday, we just gave you one. You're welcome.

Brad Crowell 6:04

Yeah, all right. Coming up it is. We are in the middle of our Black Friday Cyber Monday sale right now for OPC, onlinepilatesclasses.com. Just go to, actually check your emails. But I want to say it's opc.me/bfcm, Black Friday Cyber Monday, for the short link for that. In December, in literally a week, we leave and we hit the road. We are driving to Colorado. We're gonna be in Colorado Springs. We're not gonna review all the days and the locations and all the things.

Lesley Logan 6:32

There's 23 of them.

Brad Crowell 6:33

There are 23 cities, public stops there. And we have, you know, definitely more than 50% sold out. We are more than that already as we're recording this, and you know.

Lesley Logan 6:44

Powered by Balanced Body, so we're gonna be bringing our Controlology line with us. We'll have some prizes from them. You don't have to be a Pilates instructor to come. You don't even have to have done Pilates for you to come. (inaudible) my fucking friends have come, and they don't, have never done it before. So you are welcome to bring a family member or ditch them and say that you have something to do for work. It's important. Everyone understands. So go to opc.me/tour for tickets in the remaining stops. And then what's also happening later in December, because we're not doing a Black Friday, Cyber Monday sale for Profitable Pilates this year, we are doing something special December 26th through the 31st so, but you'll need to have the be on the email list for Profitable Pilates. So if you're not on that list, you need to get on that list, yeah, and go do that. And then after our tour is over, we come home. I fix my roots, I change my nails, I launch a mentorship program, and then we drive out to Huntington Beach.

Brad Crowell 7:40

I think I'll shave while you're doing all those things.

Lesley Logan 7:40

I mean, you'll have your shave going on, but you'll probably need a trim. So we're gonna go, we'll be at the Pilates Journal Expo in Huntington Beach. It's the first time the Pilates Journal is doing an event in the States. It's a humongous lineup of teachers, some that I, who I used to take from when I was a baby Pilates person, and some that I've taught how to teach. So it's kind of crazy. So you'll want to go to the Pilates Journal Expo to join us on that party, xxll.co/pilatesjournal. Then we're home for a little bit, thank goodness, because, like everybody and their mom is wanting to visit in February, and, oh, there's more in January.

Brad Crowell 8:05

Yeah, there's more in Jan. So we're gonna be.

Lesley Logan 8:12

It's also my birthday. I don't see that on the events list.

Brad Crowell 8:17

For those of you who've been interested in joining us on a Pilates retreat where we hang out, we decompress from all the insanity that this life has for us. Each and every one of us is different. Go to crowsnestretreats.com. Get yourself on the waitlist. In January, we're going to be doing our pre sale, our early bird for our retreat for next year, which will be in October at our home in Cambodia. We're actually going to be doing a call at the middle end of January. It's not yet on the calendar exactly, but we're going to have a call, and we're going to interview a couple of our past attendees. We're going to hang out, we're going to talk about the trip and all the things that everybody's ever wanted to know. It's going to be great. So come join us for that, but you got to be on the waitlist for that. Go to crowsnestretreats.com to get on the waitlist. And then in February, something that is really I'm passionate about as well, is Agency Mini. Okay, so as you know, we coach Pilates business owners, and we have a coaching program and all those fun things. But people ask, you know, often look at it and go, I don't know if I'm ready for a six month commitment. No problem. That's why we created Agency Mini, and it's a three-day program. Okay? Used to be seven. We've shrunk it down to three, because we all know how crazy life actually is. It is a really powerful three days, and you should join us for that. Go to prfit.biz/mini prfit.biz/mini. That's profit without the O.

Lesley Logan 9:35

And then we get on our plane for the first time in almost six months.

Brad Crowell 9:39

Which is insane.

Lesley Logan 9:40

Insane but so delicious. I'm sitting here knowing we have six months not.

Brad Crowell 9:45

Of no flying.

Lesley Logan 9:46

So it's the really ridiculous thing. But I saw it on the day we were at the airport some reel which is like, Have you ever been to the airport and you realize, like, every time I go to the airport, it is everybody's first time on this earth. And so I was just like looking at people, and honestly, I had more empathy for them. I'm like, well, it's their first time here. And then we pull a move where we like, just stop in the middle of the airport, like you did, like, like people do, and then we're just like, turn and like, I'm like, so sorry.

Brad Crowell 10:11

Cutting people off. Oops.

Lesley Logan 10:11

Like, I was like, oops, I'm so sorry. It's our first time on this planet. They didn't understand what I was saying. But I laugh my heart out. But anyways, we're home for six months, and then when we get on a plane, it's a big deal because we are going to be in three different countries, teaching in the content, continent of Europe, because I can't say the EU anymore, since the Brexit. So school year, we're starting to right, I have to like London and England is its own thing.

Brad Crowell 10:37

Almost positive.

Lesley Logan 10:38

I have to say, like the European continent, so annoying, but we'll just say,

Brad Crowell 10:44

Yeah, it's considered part of Europe geographically.

Lesley Logan 10:46

But not the EU.

Brad Crowell 10:47

Although technically it's the European continental shelf. Anyway, no, it's not the EU but it is part of Europe.

Lesley Logan 10:54

It's like when we were in John o'Groats, and we had to be so specific, we couldn't say we were at the top of the UK. We had to say we're at the top of the mainland UK.

Brad Crowell 10:58

Right. Because there are islands north of the mainland.

Lesley Logan 11:01

Or top of mainland Scotland. So okay, so in March, we're going to be in Poland at the Controlology Pilates Conference, xxll.co/poland Karen Frischmann is doing that with me, and it's really fun. We haven't been back there in a couple of years. Really, really great time. Really cool people there. So I can't wait to see you guys. And then the next weekend we'll be in Brussels. Els Studio tells and you want to go to xxll.co/brussels same, two teachers, very different workshops, also private sessions. So choose the adventure you want to go on, check out both lineups, and pick the one you want to go to or come to both and hang out with us in two different countries, why not? And then in April, Brad and I will be at the POT in London. We're very excited about it, it's my first POT in London, (inaudible) I know it's, it's gonna be a great time. It's gonna be a really fun to see all those people. So pick the one you want, my European fabulous people, because that's it for 2026. That's all there is.

Brad Crowell 11:59

So xxll.co/poland or slash Brussels. Eventually we might have slash London, but they're not. They don't even have a landing page up yet to buy tickets for that.

Lesley Logan 12:08

From the time that we're recording this.

Brad Crowell 12:08

Yeah, we're just, we're putting it on your radar. So go to pilates.com and go see their continuing education. That's where they have all that information about future POTs Pilates On Tour.

Brad Crowell 12:19

All right, so this week, we had a question for you from Natalie.

Lesley Logan 12:25

Hit me with it.

Brad Crowell 12:27

@nathalieds9011 asks on YouTube about the video, How to Take Your Pilates Practice Outdoors. She said, hey, how about doing Pilates outdoors during winter in Madrid, which is where I am, winter is not extreme. I have a big terrace, which is where I do Pilates. Since inside my apartment, there's just not that much space for me to move.

Lesley Logan 12:43

I mean, if you live somewhere where it's beautiful in the winter, fuck yeah. Do it outside. Tag me in a video. Take one of my classes on OPC, or Pilates Anytime or on YouTube. And I want to see your, I want to live vicariously through you, because, let me tell you, I would love being in Madrid in the winter. Instead, I am in the winter places.

Brad Crowell 13:04

I'm in the winter places.

Lesley Logan 13:04

I'm in the places where winter happens. But I would, love that's great. I mean, like, when I did that video, I was being conscious of, like, if I say, you do it outdoors, I'm gonna get someone say I can't. It's negative 21 degrees here, and it's gonna be 115 here. So I have to, like, you know, be considerate, because some people just don't feel seen. So you, my dear, are in the blessed space. We actually have a couple OPC members who also live in Spain, and they do their Pilates outside all year long. So please, rock on. Do it, but, but basically, when you're doing Pilates outside, there's just things to consider. You can check out that video we did on YouTube, because I'm not gonna list the exhaust, exhaustive list that I gave on there, but we just did Pilates in Cambodia, and something we have to consider is, like bugs, you know, rain. We can do it in the rain there, because we have a covered patio, but as long as the rain isn't going sideways, which can happen, then we have these things that we bring down to make the walls. So it's not so much water on the patio, but the mosquitoes don't care, so we have to we have extra fans that like make it harder for them to land, you know. So there's just things you want to think about when you're doing Pilates outside, and I have blue eyes, it is really difficult for me to do outside Pilates when there's no cover. I was doing, early in the spring, I was doing yoga outside in the morning, and it was fine, as long as I was in down dog, but the moment I came up, the sun was in my face, and I was like, well, this isn't this is terrible. I need sunglasses, but you can't do sunglasses. You can't work out with sunglasses. So like you just it looks stunning. Just make sure you have things set up so that you're not constantly distracted from your workout, about being outside. You know that's all.

Brad Crowell 13:06

Love it.

Lesley Logan 13:06

If you have a question, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534, or submit them at beitpod.com/questions, where I would like you to send a win as well. I'm being demanding here. Come on. You have a win in your life. You do. You wanna know something, one of our retreaters would.

Brad Crowell 13:06

You wanna know something.

Lesley Logan 13:06

You wanna know something. One of our, one of our retreaters shared a win one day after our retreat. She said, I only said, I'm sorry two times. It was amazing. Like, if you walk around like, that's a fucking win. Huge win. Instead of walking around, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Like, she just said, excuse me, and then when she needed to, she said, I'm sorry, and she's like, oh, two times it was such a win. So those are the wins I want to hear. I don't need to hear, like, I have my biggest launch ever. Okay, great. That's wonderful. I'm super excited for you, and you can send that in, but like, there were little wins along the way. And if you don't celebrate those you are, you're unlikely to feel fulfilled for a long period of time. So send them in.

Brad Crowell 13:37

Yeah, I just looked up on our board we have a win.

Lesley Logan 13:37

Great.

Brad Crowell 13:37

I'm gonna read it.

Lesley Logan 13:37

Oh, okay, okay great.

Brad Crowell 13:37

Big win this week. This is from Jordan BB, I've neglected using my Wunda Chair for quite a while now. So I decided it was time to break out my Chair Flashcards. I started working through the order and whatever bits of time I had available each day, starting from the top of the deck each day to get to the to get the repetition. By the time I got to my second week, I started feeling connections in my body that the week previous, I couldn't have even dreamed of. Exercises that felt impossible to move were actually moving. But even better, I felt more connected to myself. Super excited to add my Chair back into my regular rotation. Thank you, Lesley for the amazing flashcards.

Lesley Logan 16:32

I mean, I'm so grateful for you. And don't click that off, Brad, because I'm going to say it on FYF so she can hear it on one of those episodes. But thank you like that is so freaking cool.

Brad Crowell 16:42

Great job, Jordan.

Lesley Logan 16:43

I just want another shout out to Jordan. She is also a listener who, when she discovered this podcast, went back to the beginning and listened to every single one.

Brad Crowell 16:51

Wow.

Lesley Logan 16:51

I know. So pretty big deal. Pretty amazing win. All right, Jordan, you're amazing. I'll put that in FYF so you're gonna hear it twice, because what if she misses this episode? All right, let's talk about John Mollura.

Brad Crowell 17:05

John Mollura. Okay, so stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to talk about John.

Brad Crowell 17:11

Welcome back. All right, let's dig into this convo you have with John Mollura. John is a personal coach and keynote speaker who helps people move from fear and hesitation into confidence and action, which I love that. For 15 years he had he led test operations on NASA missions before stepping into a new chapter as an award winning photographer, with work featured in National Geographic. Today, he shares those experiences through coaching and his signature talk, Elite Level Confidence, giving people simple tools to build trust in themselves and take consistent action in their lives. Look, we, Lesley and I have, man, we connected with John three or four years ago now, and.

Lesley Logan 17:52

At least, he was in the hundreds. So.

Brad Crowell 17:54

Yeah, look, if you like to read newsletters, John's newsletters are great. He really takes time to write enjoyable newsletters, and I read them.

Lesley Logan 18:05

You don't read anything.

Brad Crowell 18:07

I don't really read anything. So John's newsletters are really fun. So I really like that. I feel like I've been along his journey with him, as he's shifted from engineer to photographer to now being a speaker and a coach, so we're really fired up for him. It's been awesome to have him. He's coming to speak to Agency, our coaching group multiple times, and his content is available for those who are members of Agency. And then we were like, hey, man, would you like to be back on the pod? And we got this epic episode. It's like this episode felt like a mic drop moment on every chapter of the conversation that y'all, y'all were having, you know, talking about confidence, talking about perfectionism, talking about all these great things that, I, I literally listened to it twice. So.

Lesley Logan 18:58

I love that, that's so good. Well, thanks for doing that. I mean, it's so fun to have guests back and see where they've gone. Some people have gone further in the same lane. Some people have switched lanes. Some people have reversed and then rewound and, you know, like it's and so he has switched lanes. But really it seems like it all aligns, because he, basically what I like that he said, which goes with what I'm just saying, is that he talked about, it's being really important to be aware. Like, the more aware you are, it's actually a really powerful thing and and it's because when you have a seeker mindset, right? Like, that's going to help you, when you have that curiosity, it's going to help you in what you want to be and what you want to do. So clearly, he was in that seeking mode, that being aware mode, and that's where he's like, Oh, I'm a, I'm an award winning photographer, I'm a NASA engineer, but I actually really want, I'm feeling called, to do this thing over here and it lights me up, and that, you, just going to Gay Hendricks like, that's his genius zone. Like, it would be so easy for him to it's, it's a what does Gay call it, like, your whatever. Like, there's a zone of excellence, which is his photography, but his own genius is this. And I just really loved it. He also said, like, when you are being aware, it's important that you don't judge yourself with your awareness. Like, that's where the critic lives. You like things you'll say is like, well, that's not gonna happen. Or, like, this is never gonna work. But instead, shifting into that seeker mindset and having awareness and curiosity.

Brad Crowell 20:23

Yeah, that, so, okay, this part, I thought, was really heartfelt, because he already in his adult life with kids and a wife changed from being a, I'm guessing, stable, high paying government job, where he's an engineer for NASA, to an unstable, potentially high paying, but who knows, job of being a photographer. Now he happens to kick ass at being a photographer, you know, but he said, the engineering job, he quit. He started something else. He got another engineering job, then realized that still wasn't the right answer. Then he started doing something that he found fulfilling. And then after a while, was like, this isn't doing it either. And then decided to make us another change in his adult life. And he's like, I honestly didn't even want to tell my wife, because she'd already been on the journey with me getting out of being an engineer. And now I'm like, thought I was doing the thing I wanted to do, but I'm not feeling it, you know, it's not actually the right thing for me. And and then, you know, and so he has, what I thought was really great, is you threw in there. Well, look, it was maybe we end up thinking that we need to do this thing for because we made the decision, right? For me, this really resonated with my decision to go to college for music, right? And I left. And then my whole time in Los Angeles, for the for the first decade I was there, I was like, I am a musician. That's how I defined myself. It's how I saw myself. I am in a band. I do perform. This is what I do. This is who I am. And when you started, when that started to shift and change and not be that anymore. I was like, well, what do I do now? You know, that I'm not, you know, can I do something else? Like, am I allowed? Because I felt (inaudible), I had literally spent $80,000 or whatever was going to college. I don't even know. A lot of money, you know, going to college to be a musician, you know, am I, am I like, is it okay to not be a musician anymore? You know, while I still can think of myself as a musician today, that's not my primary thing that I'm doing, but it was just one step along the way and and I think it's okay for us to be making these changes in our lives. You know, my I never talked with my friend about this, but my high school buddy went to school to be an engineer, right? He went to Germany, he came back, he was doing all this really fancy engineering stuff, and then somewhere along the way, was like, I this isn't it. And then he went back to school to be a doctor. Like, I was like, wait, you signed up for like, four more years of school after already going to, like four or five years of school. And, you know, now he's a doctor, and I have to imagine he really likes it, or he wouldn't keep doing it. But that is quite a path to jump from one to another, especially when the foundation to become a doctor again, you're, you're starting over, in a way, you know, so.

Lesley Logan 20:25

Yeah, I think that's and I think that clearly in that instance, like, he must have had to be a seeker and not a judger in his like, well, this is gonna work. Oh my God, it's four more years of school.

Brad Crowell 23:33

Judging himself.

Lesley Logan 23:39

Like, using himself, you know, or what like, and this is like, this is the hard part, right? Because when you share some things, it's really, really important who you share stuff with. Like, I think sometimes some of you who are listening, you so badly want someone in your life's love that you're telling them the thing that you're wanting to do, and they are not your cheerleader. It's not because they are an asshole or trying to be an asshole, it's that they are in the critic zone. And so you have to be mindful, like, who you're sharing your dreams with, until you feel the muscle is very strong. And I don't think that that was, like, why he didn't want to share it with his wife, but we were very clear, like he was just was just like, now we're starting all over again. But like, I do think that, like, there are, like, when we told my grandfather we're in Cambodia, he's like, it's not safe there, right? And we're like.

Brad Crowell 24:32

What's he, like, all he's doing is projecting his own fear.

Lesley Logan 24:34

His own fear, you know, and so, so just be mindful those of you who are listening, who are like, in the curious space, in the awareness space, and you're feeling called, yes, you have excellent investments and other things you've done in your life, but you're being called to do something else. Be mindful that you tell the friends who are like, fuck yeah, you should do that. The other people in your life, you'll tell them when the muscle is a bit stronger, because I would just be afraid that their critic will come out and bring your critic to the party, and we don't need that.

Brad Crowell 25:05

Well, I think, I think the high level here, you know, the conclusion of this thought is awareness plus curiosity is a win, right? Awareness plus curiosity, it enables progress, right? So no matter where you are in your life, no matter what projects you're working on, if you have both awareness and curiosity, you will be able to move that ball forward. So love that. And speaking of your grandfather, that leads into what I really loved in a roundabout way, you'll get, we'll get there.

Lesley Logan 25:36

I can't wait. I'm excited. I'm looking at these notes. Did you know, my grandfather?

Brad Crowell 25:41

I did. So the big three that John talked about, this was a whole nother chapter of the conversation, and this is where I kept saying, these are mic drop moments, you know? He said, hey, look, you know, it's not even about perfection. It's not even about procrastination. He said, in fact, there are the, these are the big three things that I talk about all the time, perfectionism, procrastination and overthinking. He said these three behaviors constantly derail us from doing the things that we want to do, or the things that we say are so important for us. And he said the thing that they're like they don't, all three of them share the same root. Okay, what are, what is the root of perfectionism, procrastination and overthinking?

Lesley Logan 26:22

Drum roll, please.

Brad Crowell 26:26

Fear. Right? And this is what your grandfather was, was applying. He was, he was projecting his fear on us. And that's when, when you share something with someone, be cautious of that in the sense that they are, they know you really well. They love you. They want the best for you. And they are going to immediately, like, look at it and see what is the problem that that could happen here. And they're going to push that out there and right? And that could be really deflating for you, especially if you aren't yet, like you don't yet have surety in the place you're going, you're feeling it out right, because that, like they don't want you to be hurt or fail, or any of those things and fear is that that root, and it's easy for that to blossom into these things, perfectionism, procrastination and overthinking. And he said, by understanding that fear is the root of these three people, can now get honest with ourselves and begin asking, what is it actually that I'm so scared of? What is it actually? I can't remember who it was, but a couple weeks ago, we had another episode. She was a business coach.

Lesley Logan 27:37

Oh, Jill.

Brad Crowell 27:39

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it was, I think it was her. She said, what am I afraid of? What's the worst could happen. I could go bankrupt, right? And I was like, well, that's a pretty big deal, you know? But for her, she was like, okay.

Lesley Logan 27:52

Jill Allen. Dr. Jill Allen.

Brad Crowell 27:52

Dr. Jill Allen, yeah she said, okay, I could go bankrupt. And it's like, well, okay, but she acknowledged that, like, what am I so afraid of, if that's the worst that could happen can that be overcome? Like, is that like, it doesn't it's not something to laugh at. But what if it do? What if it does happen?

Lesley Logan 28:10

I don't know. Do I share this, like, my, I remember my trainer when I was, like, thinking of breaking up with my ex, and I was like, just like, not. He's like, what are you afraid of? Like, I don't. He's like, you're not gonna die. Like, he's like, to me, the scariest thing, the thing that, like, the ultimate fear, is death. And you breaking up with him, you're not gonna die. Like, in my situation, I'm sure that that's not the same for other people, but in my I could, he would just let me walk away. And I was like, oh, I'm not gonna die. That is, that is I can do like, I love this question. I think it's really important to reflect on and journal about

Brad Crowell 28:40

What am I so scared of? I remember being my first I just moved to L.A. and I had no money, and I got a job at this restaurant. It took me a week to get a job at a restaurant of where I walked around to, I don't know, a dozen more, I don't even know. I would evaluate the restaurant, see how busy they were at dinner, decide, could I make enough money here, and then, do I want to work here? Does this seem cool? And I would put in an application, and I went to all these different places, and I finally got this job, because I went back a second a third time, I really wanted to work at this restaurant. And I then I met these guys, and they offered me a job. And I called my best friend at the time and I said, hey, man, I'm thinking of doing this. And he I said, but I'm worried. I'm worried about, you know, like, they're gonna pay me a salary, but I've, I've, I would be, I would have to give up my restaurant job. And he's like, you can get another restaurant job. And I was like, oh, you're right. Like, that's so true.

Lesley Logan 29:37

Yes, yes, even in a shitty economy, there's always an opportunity for something. It might not be, you know, it might not be the the restaurant job, but it would be a restaurant job like, you know, like, there's just, there's, there's options.

Brad Crowell 29:52

Yeah, so I just thought that was really astute of John to take these three things, which we all have dealt with, struggled with in our lives, perfectionism, procrastination, overthinking, connect the dots that there's fear is the root of these three things, and then how do we how do we lean into that? What are we so afraid of? What are we so afraid of?

Lesley Logan 30:18

Yeah, and your fears are allowed to be like, they could be legitimate fears. And then at least the power is removed when it has air, you know, like the power of fear is really removed when you just, like, put it out on the table. And at least then you can figure out, like, well, what would I do if that happened? You know, so I loved it. I loved, you know, John's, we posted the tour, and we'll be at Rehoboth Beach Delaware.

Brad Crowell 30:42

Yeah, it's, it's really close to where he lives.

Lesley Logan 30:45

I think it's really close. I think we should finally fucking see him.

Brad Crowell 30:53

Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be good.

Lesley Logan 30:57

John.

Brad Crowell 30:57

We're calling you out, John, we're calling you.

Lesley Logan 30:57

We're gonna, we gotta talk.

Brad Crowell 30:57

We're gonna call you.

Lesley Logan 30:53

We gotta talk about food. How about coffee. How about a happy hour?

Brad Crowell 30:57

Love it. All right. Well, stick around. We'll be right back, because we've got some great Be It Action Items from John as well.

Lesley Logan 31:04

John, you can also text us. That's fine too.

Brad Crowell 31:06

Yeah. All right, we'll be right back.

Brad Crowell 31:10

Finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What are the bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items that we could take away from your convo with John Mollura. He said, confidence is the ability to trust yourself. Confidence is the ability to trust yourself. Most of us are showing up for the person we've made a commitment to. Okay, I'll pick you up at six. Okay, I'll do the dishes. Okay, I'll take the trash out, right? You're committing to someone else. I'll do my homework. I'll do this thing, whatever. But we constantly let our own selves down. And it doesn't seem like a big deal.

Lesley Logan 31:48

It is a humongous deal. You say you're gonna go to bed at 9 pm and you don't go to bed till 10, you are literally taking a drop out of the confidence bucket.

Brad Crowell 31:57

Yeah, and it's subconscious. You might not be like, oh, can't believe it. Oh, I didn't go to bed at nine o'clock.

Lesley Logan 32:03

Please, please listen to the habits podcast, and don't do that.

Brad Crowell 32:05

In your in in your belief you're chipping away at the foundation of confidence that you have in yourself when you don't uphold your own decisions to yourself, right? And you might not realize that that's happening. But he explained the actual root cause of people's lack of confidence is that they're not showing up for themselves, and meaning that loss of self-trust because we consistently and continually break commitments we made to ourselves time and time again, that will it's it's fascinating, because John is an engineer first, so he still thinks and talks like an engineer, even though he's very creative with photography and now working with his clients and coaching. But he started talking about data, you know, or the data, sorry, and so he said, he said, you why, why don't we uphold these things to ourselves? Because we never have upheld these things to ourselves. But we can change that. We can rectify that by starting to keep these promises to ourselves. When you start to give your brain a new set of data to work with, instead of the old data of broken self-promises, right? So how do we do that? Small, consistent actions that aren't a big thing, but over time, they add up to I am consistent. I do this thing. I do wake up, you know, earlier. I do go all the things that we say we want to go do, but we don't uphold we don't do them. Why don't we follow through? It's because we never have. Well, we can change that by making these small decisions, day by day.

Lesley Logan 33:38

Agreed. I loved these, he gave us some questions, and this is really fun thing for you to journal upon. It said, when making conscious decisions on honor one's future self, one must ask, is what I'm going to do or not do going to cause me to be a hero to the future me? I love this like I love this. I look back at the the me in 2013 who made that big decision, go, I'm a fucking hero to myself, like, I thank God I fucking did that when I did it, because my whole life was like the domino effect of like, everything that I wanted. So yes, right? The goal is to ensure that when you meet your future self, you are not staying there tired and disappointed because you failed to go after it. Like if you ever said, oh, by this date, I want to have X thing. And then you didn't do anything, and then you got to that day like, I wanted to be over here by now. Well, the effort thing, it's not like I have missed dates on goals that I was working towards. And there's a difference between actually working towards something and the deadline is further than you thought, than not doing anything at all, and getting to the deadline,

Brad Crowell 34:47

I think, I mean, I was thinking about goal setting and all that kind of stuff. Like, okay, this, this quarter in business, we're gonna do $100,000 and you, you know, work, work, work, and you make only $60,000 but it was more than you've ever made before. It doesn't mean that you like didn't make that you didn't keep a promise to yourself.

Lesley Logan 35:09

Right. Well, were you, were you the person who could like, did the effort you put towards it, could it have been $100,000 if the stars had aligned? Then, then you should, whatever you land with you should celebrate, because the person that you made yourself be to do those things is the goal, is the journey, right? Is the hero. So the action should result in you high fiving yourself and saying, thank you for honoring me. Thank you for doing that, that the thing in that moment. He also said, you can call him. You guys, I have not like, that's insane, free calls. And he also gave some free resources over on his site, on johnnmollura.com, that's John with an H-N-N.

Brad Crowell 35:10

Yeah, J-O-H-N-M-O-L-L-U-R-A dot com, johnmollura.com.

Lesley Logan 35:49

Yeah. So check those out. I love it. John, you're such an inspiration. Thank you for sharing your journey with us and the Be It Till You See It babes. I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 36:06

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 36:07

Thanks for joining us. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Tag John. Tell us. Send this to a friend who needs to hear who needs to be a hero in their life, and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 36:17

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 36:19

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 37:00

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 37:06

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 37:10

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 37:17

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 37:21

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

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608. The Big Three That Steal Your Confidence